Oct
13
2012
Caption Contest
Leave a comment providing the winning caption to the picture above and win a free Moonbattery.com t-shirt, suitable for any formal occasion, courtesy of the esteemed countermoonbats at Party Crasher.
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On a tip from Byron.
This is your brain on nitrous oxide.
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Dang! Those new plugs are itchy!!
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I’m a big boy Paul, can fart all by myself. I don’t have to pull your finger!
Whoa! There goes a real stinker right now! Ha ha!
Damn, everytime Ryan kicks me in the ass with facts, my hemmerhoids flare up!
Dang I didn’t realize what we were doing was that funny until now.
Relax Joe, it’s not that funny.
I was just thinking about that “Recovery Summer” B.S. that I fed the public.
“Ah ha ha ha, ohhh…You and your labels, Paul…The Taliban are not our enemy…ah ha ha ha ho ho ho hee hee…ahhh Republicans…ah ha ha ha…”
Joe, I told you not to drink the kool-aid
“Now calm down, Joe. Show some dignity. You’re the Vice President, man. Act like it.”
These whippits are fabulous!
If I laugh louder maybe they won’t nail me on the BS we have pulled. Insanity defense at work.
“Been hangin’ out with Barry a little bit too much now, have we, Joe?”
“Taxin’ people who make a milion dollars or taxin them at $250,000… what’s the difference when we’re just gonn’a spend it all on pork and choom my friend”
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Oh, that’s too funny Chong! You got ta try that Total Absorption thing.. outrageous, hahaha.. Barack showed me how to do it, hahahah.. in fact I even had a few roof hits on the way here.. hahahaha!!
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Cannot laugh at this one. Scares the hell out of me.
Biden: “Tell me that one about Land of the Free again!”
Mr. Vice President just to confirm, this is your response to the American people who are looking for leadership in Washington to the facts that we’ve got four dead Americans on the anniversary of 9/11 after the calls for more security in Benghazi went unanswered by this Administration, Iran is on the verge of finalizing nuclear weapons, Al Quieda is expanding in North Africa, the American flag is burned at the Egyptian embassy while the Muslim brotherhood led government you all supported looks the other way, 23 million of Americans are unemployed, the deficit has risen 6 trillion dollars the last 4 years, the price of gas has nearly tripled in 4 years, the economy is growing at barely 1%, the unemployment rate in your own hometown is 10%, we’ve spent $90 billion of taxpayers funds on crony green energy bankrupt boondoggles, this is the longest recession since the Great Depression, the Fed is printing more money to dilute our currency and increase our indebtedness to China, the Senate has not passed a budget in 3 years, people are hurting in this country, Obamacare will kill more jobs an raise taxes mostly on the middle class, and taxes are going up on everyone if Obama gets another term.
“Oops,” laughing hysterically I crapped my pants…Hooo-hooo-hoo
“I just sharted in my Depends. hahahha”
Hahahaha, for my next obnoxious trick to gain the trust of the American people, I will now choke on my own false teeth and fake a heart attack.
Thorazine stat!
Vice President Joe Biden reacts in disbelief when Congressman Paul Ryan explains to him that “Big Bird” is actually a man in a costume.
Some of the possible common medical causes of Inappropriate laughter may include:
Drug intoxication
Substance abuse
Dementia
Temporal lobe injury
Tic disorders
Tourette syndrome
Social anxiety
Angelman syndrome
Pseudobulbar palsy
Gelastic epilepsy
Brain tumors
Multiple sclerosis
Amyotrophic lateral sclerosis
Oh my!!! Ryan said TRAIN!!
Choo Choo!! WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!
He Haw
Hey Joe, Mr Ed called. He wants his teeth back.
That reminds me of the story of your aunt Ruth and I…..
Hey! You little punk, Ryan , Do you really think anyone in DC, now, gives a sh!t about middle class America, Jobs or the threat of Isalm?! hahahahah1 hohohhooo! God what a fool you are, Ryan! hohohohoho!
The brainstem with a smile.
“Paul! Seriously! I plagiarized that line before you were even born!
“I’m rich, b*tch!!”
That’s the attitude of anyone who’s made a lifelong career out of the Senate.
“Settle down, Joe. We’ll get you back to the home as soon as this is over.”
Ryan: “Over 100 million people were slaughtered in the totalitarian movements of the 20th century. And it’s likely that a super-virus will wipe out humanity sometime in the next 50 years, after Iran nukes Israel.”
Joe. You didn’t hear me.
I said you’re using style over substance.
Not smile like a dumbass.
Tonight’s debate was brought to you in part by Adderall, which can help reduce symptoms of hyperactivity, inattentiveness, and impulsivity in children and adults.
You say he was raped before he was killed, now that’s funny stuff
“Your farting is a new low in interruption Joe!”
Iran just nuked Israel? HA HA HA HA HEE HEE HEE HAW HEE HAW HEE HAW!
Folks, my friend Paul Ryan is that dreaded three-letter word. Liar!
“Joe!! Get a grip, man! You’re an embarrassment. The party’s over. Grow up. You’re Vice President of the United States. Try acting like it. Show some dignity and self-respect. Our friends and enemies are all watching. You represent us — America. So quit being such a weenie.” (Ryan thought bubble: Where do they get these people, anyway?)
Clueless Joe tries to laugh his way around issues he doesn’t understand and can’t begin to comprehend, believing that others will see him as intelligent and wise.
They really are that stupid.
Biden: “The stimulus package prevented the United States from entering a great depress… sorry I can’t say this with a straight face. Can we do a retake…what do you mean this is live?”
Ryan trying to explain women’s health issues by using Michelle as an example.
Biden: ‘You think she’s female’
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They’re coming to take me away ha-ha!
They’re coming to take me away ha-ha!
They’re coming to take me away ha-ha!
They’re coming to take me away ha-ha!
Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!!
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Ryan trying to explain women’s health issues by using Michelle as an example.
Biden: ‘You mean that she-male’
Hee hee hee – I got the giggles – got any munchies?
Biden – one hour prior to debate: “Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit shrooms.”
Biden in photo: “Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!”
Haw ha ha .. the voters are so stupid they will think something is wrong with Ryan, all I have to do is act like a little child and be rude, while laughing at everything he says… the idiots will fall for it. This is too easy.
Look Mr. Vice President. Just because you have carnal knowledge of the minister of agriculture of Outer Mongolia, doesn’t make you fit for office.
Sorry, I was just thinking about that time I said you couldn’t work at a 7-11 unless you had an Indian accent…I mean, that time I told that guy in the wheelchair to stand up…no wait, I mean the time I said President Obama had a big stick…Or was it the time I said jobs was a three letter word?
I’ll tell you what’s so funny. I’ve listened to you all night, and not once have you offered up any free shit! You’ll be lucky if it’s only 47% that doesn’t vote for you.
Hey Joe, have you heard this one? A narcissistic pinko-liberal Muslim, his pet gorilla, and a senile blowhard Catholic walk into the White House. They jacked up America nearly irreversibly. Then a Mormon came along, evicted them, and loaded ‘em up into a catapult and shot them into the middle of the Atlantic Ocean. Get it?
I’m sorry Mr. Vice President…Is that your “Iran will get a nuclear bomb” laugh? Or is that the “Al Qaeda just killed our ambassador” chuckle? Or would that be the “4th trillion dollar deficit in a row” chortle? Perhaps it is the “12 million people are unemployed” guffaw?
Loving this new denture grip…I can laugh and laugh…no slipping!
Bwaaa-haaaa-haaa. We can’t lose Paul. 51% of the people in this country are more ignorant than I am….and we take advantage of that.
See these pearly whites – bought and paid for by those stupid, stupid taxpayers. Gawd Damn I love my free loading job! Vote for me and Golf Stream One so we can continue to screw you to death!!!
“I don’t even understand what you’re talking about and neither do I.”
Biden”"Thats Rich Paul” I thought you said Romneys a Moron”?
Quick! Does a fart have lumps?
I just love inhaling those gas-filled balloons. They make me feel like a playground bully again. It was nice of my friend, Paul Ryan, to give me all those balloons right before this debate, or whatever this is. God love him.
“Did you hear that, Martha? I just called Ryan a ‘poopy-head’!
Say it ain’t so! First Big Bird corrupted Obama and now Tickle Me Elmo got to Joe!
Oh geez my hemorrhoids itch. If I don’t laugh, I’ll cry.
“And then I asked some poor guy in a wheelchair to stand up so we could recognize him! Ahahahahahahaha!”
A Socialist, Muslim, and Illegal Alien walk into a bar and the bartender asks, “What’ll you have, Mr. President.”
Joe: “Pull my finger, Paul”.
Paul: “When are you going to grow up, Joe?”
You’re telling me that I am the Vice President? You are sure funny Paul!
Lower taxes? You’re killing me here!!!
A Priest, a Rabbi, and a Muslim walk into a bar in Jerusalem. Holy crap, the Muslim blows everybody up. Barack says he gets 72 virgins! 72!
What You See Is What You Get.
Ryan: Iran said it wants to wipe Israel off the map.
Biden: Like they say in the great state of Missouri, “Show Me”.
Where will YOU be when YOUR medication wears off? Ask your doctor about new “Antibidex” from Pfizer, today.
“Oh, I shouldn’t have had that second burrito!”
Hillary Clinton is as qualified or more qualified than I am to be vice president of the United States of America….and we just threw her under the bus.
Hope and Change…
Yes We Can…
Forward…
HAAAAAAAAAAAAAA…
Brains! I don’t have any!
I overdosed on laughing gas when I got my teeth recapped this afternoon.
HA,Ha,Ha and then they asked for more security. CAN YOU BELIEVE THAT?
Benghazi? That sounds like Bengay. Huh, huh, huh, you said, ‘gay’!
So you think you’ve got a plan to reduce or pay back the tab we’ve run up? Ha Ha Ha Good luck with that!
Dammit! I knew I shouldn’t have let the “choom gang” prep me for the debate!!
His handlers told him whenever he felt over his head on a topic, a laugh is the dump signal to the moderator
Joe,
Seriously Iran acquiring nukes isn’t funny. What will the American people think after watching you tonight?
GMTA! Made this just today: https://sphotos-b.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-snc6/183398_4338454871441_205067980_n.jpg
He won’t be laughing come November.
VP Plugs, “Nuclear Iran; funny! Stalled economy; funny! No jobs; funny! Actual leadership; funny! Biased moderator; funny!”
American people, “NOT FUNNY…!!”
(Joe Biden is a Republican recruiter.)
“Shocking Secrets and Verifiable Facts about Barack Obama the MSM Refuses to Report”
http://www.youtube.com/watch?f…
All this talk about taxing the American people into poverty is giving me a woody.
” Look at you! You used to be so cocky. You were going to go out and conquer the world. You once called me a warped, frustrated, old man! What are you but a warped, frustrated young man? A miserable little clerk crawling in here on your hands and knees and begging for help. No securities, no stocks, no bonds. Nothin’ but a miserable little $500 equity in a life insurance policy.”
(With apologies to “It’s a Wonderful Life”)
Andrew Klavan: How to Behave During an Islamic Massacre
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EKerbOi_mrI&feature=player_embedded
No, I’m serious Joe. You only get a second term if the people vote for you.
Joe Biden’s response on hearing that Israel has just sustained a nuclear attack by Iran.
Martha, rub just a bit higher would you?
Joe Biden’s response to hearing Benghazi was a terrorist attack and Americans were killed.
Biden:AHAHAHAHA! You fool,You fell victim to one of the classic blunders.
The most famous is never get involved in a land war in Asia,but only slightly less well known is never go up against Barry when Marxism is on the line…BWHAHAHAHA!
Ryan(thought bubble):And to think I’m missing Dirty Jobs for this…..
After a few highballs, I just don’t give a shit!!!
Ryan: Iran could devestate Israel with just one nuclear weapon.
Biden: Ha, ha, Paul! That’s not even mathematically possible!
I called you Sarah Palin so I win this debate!
Martha that tickles!!!! Girl, you got some soft toes.
Your fly is unzipped, Joe!
…of course he’s not a muslim – HAHAHAHA – sorry, I couldn’t keep a straight face, can we do that again?
Constitution? – you’re so naive.
Biden – “I’m only laughing on the outside / My smile is just skin deep / If you could see inside I’m really crying / cause you’ll be the next veep….”
BREAKING NEWS: Iran Launching Massive Arrests Of Evangelicals
http://www.bosnewslife.com/24042-breaking-news-iran-launching-massive-arrests-of-evangelicals
Defend Human Rights, Oppose Muslim Savages, Defeat Jihad
“4 percent of those green jobs didn’t go under”
Ryan: And don’t call me friend.
Ha, ha, ha! Don’t try to confuse the issues with math facts.
Debbie said if I laugh like this I could watch Hannity tomorrow.
FACTS?! LOL! Honest to Goodness FACTS!
You think I’m funny, Joey? Funny how? How am I funny? I make you laugh? I’m here to amuse you? Funny? How am I funny, Joey? Tell me, WTF is so funny?
I’m not your friend, Joe! If you need a friend, buy a dog!
…and then Michelle said ‘pickle the grass with bad weather’
Who does your corn rows Joe, Al Sharpton?
“No, really, Joe…two plus two IS four.”
A big old biker, Mother Teresa and Obama walk into a bar…
It’s obvious where the hair was transplanted to, Joe. It becomes more and more plain where it was removed from.
You ain’t got a hair on your ass Joe, they moved ‘em all up on your head.
I’m serious Joe, he’s a better bowler than he is a golfer.
Benghazi, Joe! Not Ben Gazzara. Its a place in Africa, Joe. AFRICA. Right, the boss’s hometown. Close enough for VP, Joe.
None of this matters. We have more dead voters than you have live ones.
I’m laughing all the way to the bank…. Gotta love those government perks!
Ryan: What do you say to the accusation that you have sold your soul to the Devil?
Biden: HAHAHAHHA Joke’s on you!! Didn’t ever have one in the first place!!
“Let me explain it AGAIN, to you Joe! Just because you are Catholic, you are NOT going to get your 72 virgins…..that’s MUSLIMS!”
Hey Barack, that was some good stuff you gave me.
Hey barkeep, double Scotch neat, and keep them coming.
I am so funny, I just wet my depends.
“When a wise person debates with a fool, the fool rages and laughs, and there is no peace and quiet.”Proverbs 29:9
OK – a Catholic a socialist and an alcoholic go into a bar and the bartender says, hello Joe.
No, really Joe. All that tax money you love to spend, comes from American companies and American workers!
Laughing since 2008.
No, seriously, Joe! The American people expect their vice-president to act with a little dignity!
My favorites so far (besides mine of course):
Davis says:
October 13, 2012 at 1:09 pm
Hey Joe, Mr Ed called. He wants his teeth back.
Louie says:
October 13, 2012 at 11:40 am
“Now calm down, Joe. Show some dignity. You’re the Vice President, man. Act like it.”
The Joker debates Batman
The meningitis outbreak claimed another victim today when vice president Joe Biden attempted to eat his own face.
Joe Biden realizes Ryan means Obama when he says Obozo.
Oh yeah, laugh every time he speaks and maybe I will be taken seriously.
“Wow, if this debate doesn’t end soon it will end with Biden leaving the stage in a straight jacket.”
I wonder how the alphabet soup media will spin that?
Land of the free, home of the brave? Constitution? 2nd Amendment? Ahahaha