Dec
22
2012
Caption Contest
Leave a comment providing the winning caption to the picture of our next Secretary of State above and win a free Moonbattery.com t-shirt, suitable for any formal occasion, courtesy of the esteemed countermoonbats at Party Crasher.
The winner will be announced Monday. Free shirts need to be claimed within a week (i.e., I need a US mailing address). T-shirts for the contest are available in blue L or XL only, although white shirts and other sizes are available directly from Party Crasher, along with an excellent selection of other t-shirts guaranteed to cause moonbats to sputter with impotent rage (all shirts are currently at least 20% off).
Tip from Gary A.
“Not in the face! Not in the face! Not in the face!”
“I actually caught it, before I missed it.”
http://www.liveshot.cc
Kerry demonstrates how Global Warming causes rogue footballs
Results of this will be analogous to the results of his coming eyes-closed foreign policy.
So that’s what happened to his face.
‘It’s a fumble! FUMBLAYA! Johnny “Fumblina” Kerry fumbles the ball! ‘
With apologies to Necessary Roughness (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0102517/quotes?qt=qt0316607)
“Not in the forehead! I just had it Botoxed!”
John Kerry reporting for duty.
Looks like Americans “dropped the ball” again.
And then teresa,we were playing football…and I made this amazing catch with my face.
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“I’ll handle being secretary of the state as good as I handle this football”
Damnit! Cut! There’s supposed to be a light behind me and I’m supposed to look like Obama with the globe. I’ll be back when you idiots are ready for the shot!
Kerry wants only foreigner’s balls hitting him on the chin. Anything American disgusts him.
This isn’t the football I was hoping for.
My plan is to carry on Hillary’s tradition at State and fumble whenever possible.
John Kerry, Ready to handle the nuclear one.
Will He drop the ball just like Hillary?
Ooh! I catch like a girl.. How metrosexual of me!
Purple Heart #4 coming right up.
Still a pussy.
John Kerry Fumbles Again
Hey, if I get hurt, I can claim another Purple Heart.
Oh, my nose!
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Secretary of State! I’ll show ‘em how to spike a football!
Ooooops.. damn.. oh well.. I hope Teresa made good reservations for tonight.
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Too many great ones already. Unless I come up with something over the top I’m going to concede the winner already spoke.
This one was good but needed a bit of a tweak:
Steve442 says: December 22, 2012 at 10:11 am
So that’s what happened to his face.
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Maybe:
John Kerry demonstrates the fine points of how he tweaks his look to get ready for television appearances.
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Thank god – yeah I know he doesn’t really exist – I’m not running for president right now. This feels like a Dukakis in the tank kind of moment..
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Does he have to throw so hard?! I just got my nails done!
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I knew we should’ve done Badminton. I mean, why do this stupid pretend I like football thing when there aren’t any real Americans around?
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To appease the Muslim Brotherhood John Kerry refrains from actually touching the pigskin.
So, I missed…I’d like to see Sarah Palin catch a football!
“Brining the same high skill level to international diplomacy”
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Ooohh, I know this looks really bad.. I can’t even catch the ball when Barry throws it..
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In an odd way, little Johnny was just like his cousin Pinocchio.. only his entire face grew ever longer every time he missed a pass..
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Damn that Teresa! I told her I wanted to go ice skating!
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OT: I just heard a news announcer pronounce kibbosh as “kyybosh”. I reckon it’s what happens when they read off a teleprompter without knowing the words on the copy.
LOL
The news media.. they make fun of themselves every day.
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New draft pick at practice after signing with the Toledo Mudhens.
This is the guy who asked for the nuclear football in 2004.
Face to lace with a political football.
Ho boy, I feel a concussion coming on!
Paki Kebab Shack says:
December 22, 2012 at 12:11 pm
New draft pick at practice after signing with the Toledo Mudhens.
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I think he went to Yale or Harvard.. same diff though. LOL
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I wonder if Bill was really joking about putting Teresa in a blue dress while I am on the road.. focus, John.. FOCUS!
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I’d rather be windsurfing..
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Sorry if I am posting too many. This is just like a steady diet of hanging sliders. How can anyone resist?
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Jodie says:
December 22, 2012 at 12:01 pm
So, I missed…I’d like to see Sarah Palin catch a football!
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Oh reeeally..?
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If only it wasn’t so damn hard to learn French! What ARE we still doing here?
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Heck. I’m not up for election. Never again! Who cares what Americans think?! I can drop balls and fumble all I want now.. Barry got back in and that’s that really matters.. no problemo! Who gives a sh*t!
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HAHAHAHA!! What’s a dropped ball compared to these dopes dropping their Nation, their future?
Americans are such LOSERS! What a bunch of OAFS! They bought the whole thing hook, line and sinker – AGAIN!
No way anyone can talk about me just dropping this ball… like, who cares?
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Hanoi john takes one for the team ?
WHOOPS
My Fourth Purple Heart…..
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Does she have to throw so hard?! Way to mess up my manicure!
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Does she have to throw so hard?! Way to mess up my manicure!
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Damn.. I only meant to post as Sarah Palin ONCE. My sincerest apologies to Sarah Palin and the Moonbattery staff and crowd.
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Dammit, Barack; not the nuclear football! You gotta hold it and run with it!
Nobody said the tight end needed to catch anything.
My shirt is going to get wrinkled.
Dammit, Barack; it is bad enough that you pass like a girl. Why do I have to spoil my image, too?
Oh that stings! Somebody get this thing off of me!
Kerry fumbles: today the football, tomorrow the world!
Lord forgive me but I hate that man. Now for caption Is someone trying to football boat me?
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She did NOT load up that ball with ketchup AGAIN! ..I’m really getting sick of this.. but I’ll lose the yacht, everything.. if I rock the boat..
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This one is my personal PHOTO OF THE YEAR. Screw NatGeo and Time and all the rest of them.
THIS ONE IS IT.
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Hillary – damn – is this a football or a hot potato?!?
“Incoming!” Admiral Kerry recollects his successful POW rescue mission.
I hear everyone laughing. Just wait until i negotiate with Iran. They wont be laughing then.
Howie Carr’s Kerry Impersonation…
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t1NdA-dg-IY
JFK’s tax evasion attempt fail,,,
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8qVebGaL700
Hey, I called bankshot!
Benghazi hot potato, CATCH!
The Unholy Handgrenade of Benghazi.
Thinking like a Detroit Lions team member.
Eeeeny eeeny oohna-wah! Oh no, not hamsters again for dinner!
If you like this, you otta see what I can do with an airplane on a football field.
This will be represented in his autobiography as the pass he caught to win the Super Bowl.
This is not a caption. The appointment of John Kerry is proof positive that the Democrats despise close stove America and those who serve in the armed services. This is disdain incarnate.
Team Obama tries a Hail Kerry pass.
Oh goody, I finally get to carry the nuclear football. Oh … it’s NOT?
I’m gonna be a great secretary of state. Look,,,, this is how I drop the ball before they even get it to me. Should be a handy skill when something like that Benghazi thing comes up.
If I close my eyes and smile, this will all workout somehow…
“With John Kerry America’s interests abroad are in very good hands.” – President Barack Obama
“In a bizarre demonstration of his superhuman power, Mr. Kerry commands a football to levitate.”
“Fumbles” Kerry has yet another Marsha Brady moment
Wasn’t there a similar picture of Monica Lewinsky.
Monkey, meet football.
Balls this close to my face, while pleasurable, make me close my eyes in anticipation!
Rim shot and a drum roll for Ummah Gummah! Ahahah! Laughter is good comrades. Laugh or go crazy.
normally i dont look this awkward touching anothers mans balls
Laces out, Dan!!!
“Hanoi John” Kerry fumbles the football over the White House fence, just like his medals.
Hot potato!
“I forgot my football bat!”
Kerry displays a model while taking a lead role in AlGore’s new campaign, ‘Global prolate spheroidization’.
More proof that Europeans are better with their feet than their hands.
I understand he got a Purple Heart for this.
John Kerry attacked by football…media collectively calls for ‘pigskin control’.
Strangely, although Kerry yelled out, “Do you know who I am?!”…the football still hit him.
Forget the caption and take a close look. Has he had chin surgery to make it less pronounced?
Kerry is attacked in Nantucket by football players after they view a 15-minute Youtube video promoting baseball.
Kerry later gives Senate testimony calling the football a ‘rapist and baby-killer’.
Secretary of State John Kerry: The manliest non-female in the Obama administration
“If I’m not truly a warrior-of-the-working-class may it start raining footballs!”
That Kerry and his magic tricks, he can not only make a ball appear to levitate, he can make a yacht disappear from the tax-man.
Hanoi Kerry dodges football thought it was a Vietnam vet throwing it.
It’s not fair in this Country when a man’s secretary is better at sports than the boss.
Kerry’s trying to hug it. He saw the rough-hewn skin and the stitches and though it was Pelosi come out to greet him.
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I might not have made the Pats, but I could’ve played on the jets anytime. Anytime, baby!
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Incomming!!!!
See Theresa? If I can catch this odd-looking ball, you can certainly wear a burka when we go to Egypt…
The other New England media uber-darling with a super-rich wife who isn’t named Tom Brady.
I was for catching it before I was against dropping it!
If he’s lightly tackled after the catch he’ll undoubtedly write himself up for a purple heart just before calling his teammates baby-killers.
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Lemme see YOU catch a football after just getting off a plane piloted by a Kennedy!
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Eeeeeewww.. football.. how icky.. sheeesh.. I can’t stand it!
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” INCOMING-G-G !!! – THIS ought to be worth ANOTHER Purple Heart !”
I’m used to playing with two balls but one will do.
If this pigskin would have had HINES KETCHUP on it….I would have caught it with my mouth.
Runner-up photo to the winning photo taken a split second later, titled: “Smash Mouth Footballer”
And this is how skillfully I will execute the office of Secretary of State.
Here we see Kerry preparing for his new post by taking balls to the chin.
Owww! Owww! Owww! Remember its a photo op! Remember its a photo op!
You know, football, if you make the most of it, if you practice hard and you do your drills, and you make an effort to be good, uh, you, you can do well. If you don’t, you get stuck as the Secretary Of State.
Herman and Grandpa trying to Show Eddie how to toss a footbal in the backyard of 1313 Mockingbird lane
Sissy.
It’s OK. I’m used to balls bouncing off my chin.
If he could throw a football as well as he can throw unearned medals, he’d be another Johnny Unitas!
Ha ha! I got mine humping a dumpy widow!
Learn about futebol, futebol! Not American football, you French pouisse!!
John Kerry Manquien named new wide reciver for New York Jets.
Forget Air Jordan, I’m Air Kerry!
Here’s John Kerry getting ready to take one on the chin for Obama…
WR ain’t your position Johnny, stick to BS!
You’re the new TE John. You’ll find out soon enough why Ms. Rice didn’t qualify.
Take a knee, John. Take two knees, John! Didn’t Hilary tell you?
On this team John, WRs wear a blue dress!
I’m the QB, John, you’re the Center. Now let’s go back in the locker room and practice!
OH I see, you’re a soccer man!
Tough playing disabled! Nam? Really, seven Purple Hearts? They run out of band aids?
Don’t tell your Muslim buddies you handle dead pigs.
Catching a football while taking a crap ain’t easy!
John Kerry: moonbat, commie, traitor, as Sec State – dropping the ball again!
… then the rocket went like this and I went like that and that’s how I received my Silver Star!
Horse face drops it like is Benghazi.
“Reminds me of incoming. I served in Vietnam ya know.”
I’m so happy to be here at Lambert Field. Now why doesn’t this soccer ball pass the global test?
Ouch! Viet Nam was never as dangerous as this!
I always knew I was better and just like the Juice !