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Jan 26 2013

Caption Contest


Leave a comment providing the winning caption to the picture above and win a free t-shirt, suitable for any formal occasion, courtesy of the esteemed countermoonbats at Party Crasher.

The winner will be announced Monday. Free shirts need to be claimed within a week (i.e., I need a US mailing address). T-shirts for the contest are available in blue L or XL only, although white shirts and other sizes are available directly from Party Crasher, along with an excellent selection of other t-shirts guaranteed to cause moonbats to sputter with impotent rage. Some are currently on sale for only $6.

Compliments of Mary P.

  • Jodie

    Come on, just for one second. Just for the cameras! F’ you then!

  • Lucky13

    just caught another pesky fly again…Mmmm

  • Sven

    I know it was you Barak, you broke my heart.

  • marcus tullius cicero

    holy batshit, the kiss of the she-vampire!

  • Geez Barack, can’t you get anything right?

  • GunnyG

    “I am Lord Barry. Good relations with the Wookie, I have.”

  • Conan

    Barack thinking: “I wish this was Rahm and we were back at Man’s Country.”

  • d3l

    “you reek of chilli-cheeseburgers, you sonnovabitch”

  • Brian_Boru

    For Pete’s sake, Barry! Just close your eyes and think of Reggie. People are watching!

  • Uh

    Moohelle’s cross-eyed smooch from hell.

  • ob

    Wich one is kissing the horses ass

  • S

    I’m gonna rip your head off and shit down your throat

  • NBPP

    Kill those white people

  • Jodie

    Glamour Magazine nominates Michelle Obama as “Temptress of the Year”

  • wayne

    Dammit ! I think I just swallowed one of his flies.

  • Bill T

    Let me demonstrate my sphincter-pucker smooch.

  • Restless

    Have a good day at work, honey… and don’t forget to punish success.

  • Brian_Boru

    Charlton Heston kissed way better than you do.

  • MNcon

    Who’s my wittle commie …

  • Bill T

    Damn Moose did you ever consider using some Bag Balm® on those claws?

  • “Barack G. Sanford, you fish-eyed fool!”

  • Michelle: “I can’t believe I have to kiss this fag.”

  • ObrownMao: “I can’t believe I have to kiss this hag.”

  • dan

    It’s almost like she KNOWS where his lips have been.

  • Buffalobob

    This won’t hurt a bit, think of it as a flu shot.

  • HookLineandStinker

    Take this last bite of ribs. I’m full.

  • Len

    Hollywood announces movie poster for NEXT TWILIGHT MOVIE !!

  • justme

    Who needs Weight Watchers just use this Nausea Inducing photo.

  • John DuBois

    Don’t even think about leaving Barry. I have your papers.

  • Jodie

    Natasha Fatale: You are so bad, you’re good!
    Boris Badenov: It’s good to be bad!

  • Naqamel

    “Ugh, I taste Reggie Love again.”

  • IslandLifer

    Sick!!!!!!!!!!! Just plain DIGUSTING!!!!!

  • Ummah Gummah


    You had some white showing, baby.. I told you to keep it discreet, didn’t I?


  • Gary C.

    Come here and give aunt Bunny a kiss, baby.

  • Rubie Styles

    Hey, watch out for the fly.

  • Alhazred

    It’s okay, Hillary can’t stand to kiss her husband either.

  • Shooter1001

    Jess hole yosef still boy, an let Aunt Esther plant one on that haff cracker face wutchew got dare!

  • Shooter1001


  • Bill T

    We’ve got to fake this for another 4 years or are you finally going to get out of the closet?

  • Shooter1001

    Bescia de mort

  • Shooter1001

    Ugh, tuna fish! Where you been Michele?

  • Highway Hospital Student

    Looks bad, smells like dog diarrhea and sounds like someone vomiting through a megaphone.

  • Xavier

    Species V: Total Control

  • wth

    sphincter pucker

  • Shooter1001

    Did Netanyahu give you a deal on Michelle’s ring, Barack? Word is, he laughed all the way back to Israel.

  • Shooter1001

    Its not always good to be the king.

  • Bill T

    barry I know how much you like to do rimjobs, is this close enough to the real thing?

  • ole.roule

    I smell Hillary.

  • Artfldgr

    Obama thinks: “I hate having to do this part”
    Michelle thinks: “I hate having to do this part”

  • 762×51

    I vant to suck your Bloooddd!!

  • Shooter1001

    Still use that Dixie Peach?

  • Skyfall

    “I’d rather be felching.”

  • SparkyWT

    Just remember; you are my BITCH

  • coregis

    I will suck your soul out…..damn, beaten again.

  • Shooter1001

    Don’t press too hard Michelle. Last time it took an hour to break the suction from those lips!

  • Sam Adams

    Yep…I can smell why the flies are attracted to you.

  • gordo

    Somebody get the swatter, there’s another fly on the President’s face and it is HUGE!!!

  • Ummah Gummah


    Guys, I don’t know what to do with him.. the programming isn’t taking.. what are we gonna do until we can get him back to the lab?



  • Shooter1001

    What’s love got to do with it?

  • Shooter1001

    MWAH! My hot skinny Kenyan!

  • IslandLifer

    Nasty slobs

  • Sam

    Did the DC Circuit Court hurt your feelings, Barry? Momma will call up and threaten that John Roberts again with her Wookie wail.

  • Oiao

    “Let me suck that fly off of U face.”

  • Steve442

    The things I have to do for my vacations.

  • Big John

    No wonder you attract flies…Your breath stinks.

  • i jist lub de taste of shoo fly pie

  • epb

    Ooo o o …. *snort *snort *grunt oo. Oo o *screech *screech *flaying hands *shake head *pace back & forth. Ooo. Oo o o …..

  • Strnj1

    “Fail and I’ll snap your neck.”

  • Skyfall @4:01…

    So nasty! heh heh

  • Skyfall

    Ahh, but Henry…you knew what it meant! lol

    Sorry, I just couldn’t resist. It says a lot about me that something like that would come into my head. I guess Obama and wife just bring out the worst in me!

  • Ghost of FA Hayek

    And you all thought that was a fly…..

  • Uh

    Poop on Rye

  • Bill T

    Sucka you better be glad you got reelected, I wasn’t ready to give up my extravagant Taxpayer funded vacations!

  • Bill T

    barry you been eatin da poo poo again?

  • SandyS

    Salt, I need salt.

  • come on give me some sugar you big eared communist bastard

  • AngryK9

    Don’t screw this up Barry. I will snap your neck so quick you’ll be dead before you hit the floor.

  • Xavier

    Paging Dian Fossey.

  • jg

    I’m yo beard baby, come here ba.. what!! git tat dam fly outta here, sheeat

  • Xavier

    Half-Black Caesar and Miss Cleo

  • Artfldgr

    you eva leave that mofo toilet seat up again, its your ass!

  • Arty

    “The Benghazi four sleeps with the fishes”

  • dennis

    I saw you with Billy-Bob Clinton! DON’T EVEN GO THERE EVER.. I see you with a cigar and it is over.

  • Jane

    Let’s keep it on the up and up this time, Bari

  • Jane

    You is my Baby Daddy and don’t you forget it anytime soon.

  • Jane

    How’s about you meet me in the Lincoln bedroom, Abe.

  • notice they both won’t kiss on the lips. Must be afraid of what might come out of each others mouth.

  • Jane

    We can try out a new “position” if you want, Backtrack…

  • Jane

    Come here, Slim.

  • Jane

    You are just my type, HoneyBucket.

  • Jane

    Light my fire, you matchless wonder.

  • Jane

    I’m a little hungry..Can I have your pie?

  • Jane

    Don’t be holdin out, Baby, just cuz I cut dat Boehner guy.

  • Veritas

    So I’m not Rahm, close your eyes and think of Barney Frank.

  • Jane

    The Man in the Empty Suit meets Enough For Two.

  • Alxandro

    “Don’t move, that fly’s got my name on it!”

  • geno

    Stay still, I’m kissing the fly.

  • lizz

    Smooch…I mean mooch

  • yourfavoriteunkle

    Tastes just like chicken shit…

  • Sam Adams

    No tongue, Barack. I know where its been.

  • bad actor

    Just think of how many times we can ‘stick it to whitey’ in the next four years! I’m getting aroused…

  • Elizabeth

    After a long day of pretending to eat healthy, a hungry Michelle smells chicken wings on Barry’s breath and goes in for the kill.

  • Richard C.


  • Alxandro

    Speaking of Michelle, have y’all seen her new drone?

  • SNuss

    This reminds me of an attack by the salt vampire on Star Trek. See:

  • Leonard Jones

    His lips taste like fly-shit!

  • Bob Roberts

    You know, there have been so many movies where a move like this was the first step in transferring some infecting organism (or energy being) orally.

    In any case…

    You can just hear Michelle saying “Why does your breath smell like semen”?

  • Alphamail

    Lord of the Flies takes venom from the Black Widow

  • Artskoe

    “Here, try the chocolate mousse – go on, try it, my king!”

  • Chris

    An actual photo of a muslim kissing a pig…

  • Chris

    B.O. – Chewie, stop screwing around and go fix the hyperdrive on the Millennium Falcon.

  • NancyLee

    Kiss of the Spider Woman………

  • Freedom Now

    Holy crap!!!

    Proof that Obama is the stupidest President ever (and that includes Presidential candidate Bullwinkle!)–nfl.html

  • Sufo

    Damn! You smell like Reggie again!

  • Shooter1001

    Did you eat all the bananas?

  • Shooter1001

    Pretend I’m Tina Turner!

  • WTSherman1864

    Next time I will snap your scrawny neck like like a strip of dog jerky and don’t you forget it!!!!

  • rex freeway

    Dammit you reek of semen and tobacco!

  • Shooter1001

    Koo Koo ka-choo, Ms. Robinson,
    Hillary loves you more than you will know

  • Shooter1001

    Can I at least get a quick hump in here?

  • I told you to stop calling Reggie. Now, I shall crush you head.

  • big-pete

    Mooch Smooch

  • big-pete

    I know it was you, Fredo. You broke my heart. You broke my heart!

  • Awlhattin O’cattle

    Proof that the anatomically impossible rectal/cranial inversion is now settled science.

    Look what crawled out of that sphincter!

  • Shooter1001

    M: BO crapped in the Oval Office again.
    B: It wasn’t the four-legged BO!

  • ahinam

    yet to see a caption that makes me lol

  • thescribbler

    NOT AN ENTRY….Both the wedding ring and engagement ring are worn on the third, or ring, finger of the left hand, and, according to the rules of proper etiquette, the wedding ring goes on first. Wedding-ring fashions change over time, but the wedding ring, which is a concrete symbol of the marriage, is always worn closest to the heart.

    Read more: Does the Wedding or Engagement Ring go on first? |

    Just found it interesting that she wears her engagement ring first on that finger. I had always heard that you are suppose to wear your wedding ring first, closest to your heart.

  • thescribbler

    My entry….

    Kiss me, you FOOL!

  • Awlhattin O’cattle

    Look at the size of that hemorrhoid!

  • Jane

    “Go Along to Get Along”

  • Rubie Styles

    Chronicles of a Fly’s Life

  • Brian

    Enough to make any man gay!

  • Artfldgr

    How come you never bow to ME?

  • Highway Hospital Student

    Probably sounded like someone walking in snowshoes through a field of grease.

  • Ummah Gummah



    Obama: Football Needs To Become Less Violent

    But he sure loves to spike the ball. Typical lib.


  • Jay B.

    Come on Barry close your eyes and imagine a nubile kenyan boy.

    Seriously, their couple looks so fake he might as well just come out as gay and claim he rented the two kids for show and most people wouldn’t bat an eyelash.

  • bee

    Come giff me large kiss, dollink!

  • MNcon

    You’re doin it wrong …

  • Rob

    I’ll pretend to kiss you and you’ll pretend to like it.

  • Highway Hospital Student

    In all fairness, this may be the ugliest, —(Moose appearing to be something akin to a large parasitic tic attached to BO’s narrow Kenyan head)—, but it isn’t the first attempt by liberals trying to simulate human affection.

    Al and Tipper Gore put on repeated public displays of canine foreplay that were only unabashed for them simply because they had learned from old movie trailers that this is what you did to impress audiences.

    In the end, Al and Tipper only impressed themselves—while everyone else discovered that their liberal fans possessed extraordinarily strong stomachs.

  • Bad Barry

    The female of the species prepares to bite the head off of the scrawny and vastly inferior male.

  • Shooter1001

    See what I have to do for you Mama?

  • Steven Kendall

    You better stop being SO CHEAP with those Government Paid vacations I get this next term or I’ll snap your head off!

  • Len

    Barack, hold still while I unravel my tounge.

  • big-pete

    The Man Trap

  • Jane

    The Great Pretenders

  • Cactiki

    Aww mom, not in front of the guys!

  • Alphamail

    Feinstein views photo — adds Assault Pucker to list

  • epb

    For the first time in her life she’s proud of her babies’ daddy.

  • Joy

    Knock this wig off, Zippy, and I’ll knock you across the room.

  • Len

    Luke, I am your father!

  • Alphamail

    URGENT: Scientists discover origin of deadly flesh-eating disease

  • Len

    Psst, cool it, moo-chelle, your chin is growing an extra succubus mouth again.(look closely)

  • Jane

    Something’s screwed up here…

  • Jane

    Let me put it to ya this way, Baby.

  • Jane

    No, no, no, I’m the Queen.

  • bad actor

    Ok, but this time I get to be the shepherd, and YOU be the sheep!

  • Eleanor in Hell

    Look Franklin! It’s Eva Braun at The Eagle’s Nest.

  • F.D.R. in Hell

    In your dreams, Babs.
    In. your. dreams.


  • True Blue

    “Okay, I caught that tasty fly; now don’t let me catch you on Drudge with another…”

  • Sam Adams

    Has my little Barry finished fundamentally transforming America yet?

  • Hows it feel to kiss Peter Griffens negative?

  • Jane

    “Paradise by the White House Lights”

    “And we’re glowing like the metal on the edge of a knife
    Glowing like the metal on the edge of a knife”
    (Meatloaf, “Paradise by the Dashboard Lights”)

  • Miz Barkee

    Is that a fleck of fly sh!t on his cheek?

  • Miz Barkee

    Four more years of photo op kisses! *sigh*

  • Jane

    Dingleberry wishes he had an imaginary wife…or at least a composite one.

  • jc14

    Michelle ma Belle: “No lips that have touched a Double Cheese with fries from Wendy’s will ever touch mine!”

  • WhiteFalcon1

    “Let me eat that fly for you, honey-bunches!”

    They kiss like their related or some ignorant shit!

  • Heltau

    You look at Boyance like that again and I am going to give you a Phillipino Haircut.

  • contessa61

    “We’re doing it honey.” smooch “We’re becoming fascist dictators to all these whiteys.”

  • “You know I’d give you a REAL kiss if you weren’t as gay as an Easter bonnet!”

  • Jane

    Getting Our MoBo On.

  • junkyard infidel

    jug ears and purple lips meet wookie face with sasquatch hips !

  • Jane

    All’s fair in love and Taqiyya

  • wingmann

    Yes Kira…we almost gottem’ by the ka-nutsack.

  • Right Reason

    “I told you to shave if you know we’re going to have to kiss.”
    “I’m sorry, Barack, I forgot.”

  • Joe

    Ammo for her secret service detail: $500. Cost of armed guards for her daughters mexican vacation: $49,000. Her husband moving on second amendment rights while she was on a hawaiian vacation: priceless.

  • Pingback: Moonbattery » Caption Contest Winner()

  • Shooter1001

    Chlamydia is not the new intern!

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