Eleven-year-old Demias Jimerson of Malvern, Arkansas is so good at football that the moonbats in charge have decreed he be stopped in the interests of imposing universal mediocrity. They have shackled him with the depraved Madre Hill Rule:
Like Jimerson, Hill attended Wilson Intermediate School and dominated the football field so thoroughly, the league invoked what came to be known as the Madre Hill Rule. Once Hill scored three touchdowns, if his team had a 14-point lead, officials banned him from scoring any more touchdowns. Now, for the first time since, the Wilson Intermediate Football League is using the Madre Hill rule again — to tackle Demias Jimerson.
Despite finding himself in a world controlled by twisted idiots, Demias appears to have a solid head on his shoulders.
“I’m gonna run hard and bring our team to victory,” said Jimerson. Then he added, “but God always comes first, before anything, and grades second.”
God, grades, then touchdowns — Madre Hill Rule or not.
Clearly more has to be done to correct this kid’s attitude. Don’t worry; educrats are on it.
Punishing excellence as if it were a sin instead of something precious to be nurtured is the purest essence of liberalism. It’s only a matter of time before this mentality begins to infiltrate professional sports, reducing them to a complete waste of time. But that’s okay, we’ll still have PBS to keep us entertained.
On tips from Varla and J.