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Mar 17 2016

Gay Satanists Address Conservative Menace on College Campus

No worries, moonbats. There was reportedly an outbreak of conservatism on a college campus, but this is being dealt with:

The University of Minnesota-Morris (UMM) “gay devil worshippers” are coming out of the woodwork to combat an alleged uprising of conservative voices on campus, the group announced in a campus-wide email earlier this year.

The group of Satanists affirmed its mission is “to address the budding conservatism” on UMM’s campus…

Snuffing out the “budding conservatism” shouldn’t be hard. Conservative groups on the campus have a combined 20 members.

The “Queer Devil Worshippers for a Better Future” is formally recognized by UMM as an official student group and its constitution was “submitted to the University of Minnesota, Morris Student Affairs Committee for approval.” It appears the group’s pending application was approved by the university since the group is now listed on the school’s clubs and organizations page.

According to a copy of the group’s constitution, all members must “recite the Infernal Oath.” As part of the oath, members must oppose capitalism as a form of oppression.

Other forms of oppression that must be opposed include the usual laundry list of “isms” and “phobias” that generally add up to the word “normalcy.”

Social justice + satanism. The match was made in hell, but there was no better location for the marriage to take place than a modern college campus.

The group’s monthly newsletter.

On a tip from Sterling B.

  • MicahStone

    Let me take a WILD GUESS and say that the “Queer Devil Worshippers for a Better Future” are definitely supporting Shrillary !!!!

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  • The sad but unsurprising thing is that their views are indistinguishable from those of the “Christian” Left: Pro-LGBTQX extremism, anti-capitalism, anti-divinity of Jesus, anti-authority of scripture, anti-Jesus is the only way, pro-abortion, etc. This isn’t a guilt-by-association fallacy, it is a striking similarity in their political AND religious beliefs.

  • KHarn

    What REALLY bothers me is that this country (The world, maybe) is becoming more and more like “one of THOSE jokes”:
    “A gay Rabbi walks into an Irish bar one labor day afternoon…”

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  • JeffersonSpinningInGrave

    “As part of the oath, members must oppose capitalism as a form of

    It’s not about sexuality. This issue is never the issue. It’s always about communism.

  • George Lortz

    When are college administrators gonna grow a pair and bounce these yo-yo’s out of the school? ‘wholesome family fun -everyone welcome’ I would expel them for publishing lies.

  • Speed Gibson

    Gay satanists, i.e. Future accountants.

  • Ed. G. Mann

    Is this another George Soros crowd? “Fanged Cocksuckers for Hillary” will protest males that fart in the high ‘C’ register.

  • Saxon Warrior

    Yes, and they’ll discover that once they realize that the utopia they helped to enable will start shooting them or imprisoning them for being homosexual.
    This has happened in history so many times.

    It reminds me of 1979 when loads of campus useful idiots helped to overthrow the Shah of Iran because they were tired of his ‘oppression’ and they took their revolutionary instructions from some kindly bearded grandfather who promised them a new Muslim utopia. Of course, once this grandfather got into power, thousands of students were persecuted and exterminated for simply being enemies of the regime and not bowing down to Allah.

  • JeffersonSpinningInGrave

    The long march through the institutions of the communists has very definitely included the church.

  • KHarn

    “Revolutionists” are trouble-makers and malcontents; so useful to bring about the revolution. Unfortunately for them, their leaders can’t allow trouble-makers and malcontents in their “utopia”.

  • Ol’ Uncle Lar

    Future IRS accountants.

  • MAS

    Thankfully the Church has remained too focused on God and His Scriptures to play politics with Marx/Lenin/Stalin/etc…

  • MAS

    The world has gotten so strange lately that I am becoming numb to the shock value. Must be by design…

  • Henry
  • chuck_in_st_paul

    The Peoples Republic Of Minnesota – Land of 10,000 Flakes (per mile)

  • octa bright

    I spent more than twenty years as an accountant and I deeply resent being compared to those crazies!

  • Feet2Fire

    Now that’s just plain pathetic. Bet even Satan would be embarrassed…

  • Scuttlebuttin’

    Satanists opposed to any form of oppression? Did I miss the rise of the fluffy, cuddly Lucifer that gives out cookies and just wants us all to be “fweends” romping in our feetie pajamas?

    And look at that lame-ass ‘Satanic’ playlist. Lorde? Florence and the Machine? I’m detecting a very femme slant to all this.

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