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Sep 16 2011

Archie Comics to Feature Homosexual “Marriage”

Archie Comics, for decades a bastion of wholesome Americana, has like our education system been subverted by the Left to indoctrinate children with propaganda intended to normalize sexual depravity. As always with moonbats, no matter how far they push the envelope, they feel compelled to push it farther still. Now the children’s comic will feature a blasphemous mockery of a wedding featuring the openly homosexual character Kevin Keller:

“Kevin followed in his father’s footsteps and is returning to Riverdale as a war hero, but that’s not all — It’s Kevin’s wedding day!” reads a news release from Archie Comic Publications, promoting an upcoming issue of “Life With Archie.”

In this offshoot series, which runs glimpse-into-the-future storylines based on the lives of Archie, Betty and Veronica, readers soon will be able to discover how Kevin met “Mr. Right.”

Peter Spriggs of the Family Research Council is less than delighted with this ham-fisted moonbat proselytizing:

“It’s unfortunate that a comic book series usually seen as depicting innocent, all-American life is now being used to advance the sexual revolution. … I think whatever boost in sales might come from the novelty or curiosity factors will be more than offset by the number of both kids and parents who will be turned off by this storyline and its obvious social and political agenda.”

Good thing characters in TV shows don’t remain ageless, allowing the same fictional worlds to be sustained indefinitely. By now Beaver Cleaver would have been introduced to NAMBLA.

A corrupt parody of American culture.

On a tip from SR.

24 Responses to “Archie Comics to Feature Homosexual “Marriage””

  1. KHarn says:

    OH MY GOD! THAT’S… boring.

    It would be more shocking if they admitted that Betty is NOT smarter than Veronica. (For one thing, Veronica speaks several languages)

    When “blacks” became the minority of the day, they introduced “Chuck”. When Puerto Ricans became fashionable, “Maria” became their TOKEN charicter. Keven is just another throw-away character.

    As for “TEH GEYS”, I think they should have had VERONICA come out of the closet since she is an established charicter and several stories show her as VERY FRIENDLY towards Betty and other girls. Yeah, I know it’s just a “good friends” thing, but it COULD be construed as “gay”.

  2. Sexy Snake-Eyes says:

    I’m still waiting for someone to explain to me fully and completely how “homosexuality” is ‘normal’ in any way, shape for form.

    Homos hate the word ‘normal’ because it means what most people NORMALLY live by [i.e. heterosexuality].

    Sorry, homos, if your ‘lifestyle’ [and THAT is what it is…it’s a ‘choice’] is considered ABNORMAL and therefore no the ‘norm’. Our bodies our ENGINEERED to procreate HETEROSEXUALLY…hence man+woman.

    I know some of you Lefties have a sincere death-wish of self annihilation, but, you have to remember that some people actually like the opposite sex.

    [*mumbles to self, “I can’t believe I even had to say that!”*]

  3. Mickey Shea says:

    Oh no, say it ain’t so, Archie…

  4. Screwy Puppy says:

    Hate to say it, but you might want to buy this issue. It might become a valuable collectible. ( not supporting, just sayin’ … )

  5. Roflcopter says:

    I love how gays always claim to be fighting to be the same – as soon as dodt was passed a slew of gay in the military publications were launched – they don’t want to be the same, they wish to tear down any institutions that aren’t fully on board with their agenda. It’s not about marriage equality, it’s about tearing down the Christian concept of marriage.

    Archie always did seem a little light in the loafers anyway… It’s really not about Archie, it’s about them takin over every nook and cranny of pop culture that influences kids… I’m sure they will sue veggie tales soon to ensure the male broccoli hooks up with the male carrot and every little kid who watches it is taught that it’s “normal.”

    There were no male nurses or male teachers in the village people, that’s because it’s always, always about hijacking everything masculine.

  6. Mr. Heartland says:

    Not everyone assumes that normal is the same thing as good. In fact no one who isn’t a childish coward does. As for ‘death wish of self-annihilation” what do you mean? My grandparents have 30 living biological descendants. They themselves are still dead.

  7. Sexy Snake-Eyes says:

    Mr. Heartland says: September 16, 2011 at 12:03 pm

    Not everyone assumes that normal is the same thing as good. In fact no one who isn’t a childish coward does. As for ‘death wish of self-annihilation” what do you mean? My grandparents have 30 living biological descendants. They themselves are still dead.

    So, ‘Normal’ blood pressure is bad?
    So, ‘Normal’ Skin temperature is bad?
    So, ‘Normal’ eyesight is bad?
    So, ‘Normal’ blood glucose levels are bad?

    My ‘normal’ stats must make me a coward?


    My grandparents are dead too. Wow. What a fuc*ing revelation!

    Sex between opposite sexes is a feature…not a glitch.

    You might want to look into that…brown hole vortex you’re currently making sweet milky brown love to as if it mattered more than you masturbating into your furry hands.

    Just sayin’

  8. hiram says:

    You know, when I was in college, there was a comic book series called “Cherry Poptart”, and it was basically an X-rated version of the Archie comics. Go on, look it up… lol.

    It was very, very underground, though. Seems it’s now gone mainstream. Sad.

  9. Joe says:

    Bird cage liner….

  10. Peter Griffin says:

    I find Archie comics treatment of the gay marriage issue shallow and pedantic.

  11. Fred C. Dobbs says:

    Wait… people still read Archie comics???

  12. Sexy Snake-Eyes says:

    Peter Griffin…

    If only it were kept in comic books:

    Homosexuals brainwashing our children in elementary schools


  13. Sexy Snake-Eyes says:

    Fred C. Dobbs says: September 16, 2011 at 1:00 pm

    Wait… people still read Archie comics???

    I concur. I think the most ‘comics’ people ‘read’ nowadays are on cereal boxes and condom packages.
    /badump bump!

  14. The MaryHunter says:

    KHarn, maybe we missed it – didn’t they already do a lesbian Betty and Veronica story thread? Or am I anticipating the next moral-relativism move over at Archieland?

  15. Marci says:

    Well, I guess they’ll get a new crowd and lose the old, but they have to remember, that audience always wants MORE, not just more of the same. Gonna get expensive.

  16. Alan says:

    So who does he marry? Dilton, Moose, Reggie, Pop Tate or Mr Weatherbee?


  17. Fred C. Dobbs says:

    Alan says: September 16, 2011 at 2:49 pm

    Given the way moonbats operate these days, probably Mr Weatherbee.

  18. KHarn says:

    “The MaryHunter says:September 16, 2011 at 1:48 pm”

    I don’t know, but I started on on another site (The people there were OK with gays, but had a good sense of humor, too) about Betty and Veronica. I took several comics panels out of context to “prove” they were lesbians.

    My favorite is from the 50s has them on the beach and Betty is touching Veronica’s bare back while Archie looks on clueless as ever.

    “You put on MY suntan lotion, Ron, and I’ll do YOURS!”

    I mean, COME ON!

  19. Laura Castellano says:

    This is such a fad. I wonder if it will bomb as badly as I suspect it will.

  20. Gunner Jones says:

    I have three kids 10 13 17, they have no idea who Archie or the comic is. That group of characters hasn’t been relevant in decades.

    As for homosexuals

    No “normal” person bases their entire identity on how they achieve orgasm nor do they demand legislation to facilitate it.


    Mig Moose to punch his lights out but thats only if he msesses around with mooses girlfreind midge

  22. oldguy says:

    I don’t much remember the Archie comics as much as I remember the Archie 8-pagers. Is this an Archie 8-pager?

  23. Joe says:

    What’s next? An upcoming issue of Archie having sex with Scooby Doo?


    Will jughead being giving up his hamburgers and pop tates and going vegan?

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