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Dec 24 2012

Atheist Chaplains

Our fundamental transformation into a cave full of moonbats must be nearly complete. How could liberal social engineers push absurdity any farther than this?

[John] Figdor, 28, is one of a growing number of faith-free chaplains at universities, in the military and in the community who believe that nonbelievers can benefit from just about everything religion offers except God.

Hired in July by the Humanist Community at Stanford, a nonprofit group independent of the university, Figdor is one of 18 “professional leaders” at the Office of Religious Life who typically work with sectarian student groups that pay their salaries. A graduate theological degree is required for the job, and the leader is entitled to office space on campus, a parking spot and a Stanford e-mail address. The leaders guide students in whatever way is needed, whether offering advice or organizing events.

Even now moonbats are unlikely to admit that atheism is a religion, subject to the same authoritarian repression that our rulers justify by referring to the First Amendment — the one that guarantees the free practice of religion.

Chaplain John Figdor
Chaplain John Figdor lurking in the comforting shadows.

On a tip from Artfldgr.

32 Responses to “Atheist Chaplains”

  1. Winston Smith says:

    Its the BRIDE OF JABBA THE HUTT? Or the laboratory produced love child of Bob Beckel, Barney Frank and Michael Moore inserted into Janet Reno’s remaining egg.

  2. Jim says:

    The “Chaplain” need to go on TV, not to replace Bishop Sheen, but on “The Biggest Loser”. It may not work although he appears to be a loser already.

  3. Rich says:

    one of Harvard’s trophies…. is there ANY intelligence left at Harvard?

  4. Winston Smith says:

    I thought this was an article about the Moonbat Messiah. Though it should be.–abc-news-politics.html

    “An employee at the Social Security Administration’s Baltimore office has been formally reprimanded for “conduct unbecoming of a federal employee,” specifically for disrupting co-workers “by passing gas and releasing an unpleasant odor.”

  5. Billll says:

    Faith-free chaplains? We have those now. They’re called bartenders.

  6. So Cal Jim says:

    Blllll – Hahaha!!

  7. Toa says:

    Leave it to our “Liberal” betters at Stanford to consider some fat, pompous kid as a “leader of men”.

  8. guy says:

    What is absurd is people believing in a defined god that goes by any particular name. A more plausible choice for free thinking individuals to pursue is how to make sense of imponderable concepts such as creation and eternity, and searching for truth as understood, when visualized through their own experiences. Forcing your own understanding of religion on others is merely another form of tyranny.

  9. Aussie-John says:

    we don’t ‘force’ our religion on anybody. The God of the Bible has proved that He is the One and Only, the First and the Last, the Alpha and Omega.
    Did you think Christmas just sprang out of nowhere by accident?
    There is plenty of evidence to prove a Creator, it is a matter of choice if you want to believe. But for everyone, one day they will have to face God. I would rather be on His side….

    Merry Christmas to all Moonbattery readers.

  10. Ummah Gummah says:


    “guy”, don’t think that we haven’t experienced hit-and-run type snark comments before.

    Please state your purpose CLEARLY.


  11. mark says:

    Looks like he worships regularly at the all-you-can-eat buffet.

  12. James McEnanly says:

    It sounds like the old joke about Dial-a-prayer for Atheist. You call, but no one answers.
    Does he have to even bother showing up for work?

  13. Tim says:

    Remember Atheism is not a religion. But yet they still PREACH it.

  14. Tax Slave says:

    “A graduate theological degree is required for the job.”

    How do you set out to earn a theological degree if you’re an atheist? If you become an atheist while pursuing such a degree, shouldn’t you change your major? If you become one after getting such a degree, shouldn’t you change careers? What kind of semenary gives out such degrees to non-believers?

  15. Tax Slave says:

    Q. What does a dyslexic, agnostic insomniac do?
    A. Stays up all night wondering if there really is a dog.

    My sister uesd to be an agnostic, but now she’s not so sure.

    Q. What is an atheist at his funeral?
    A. All dressed up with no where to go.

  16. Skyfall says:

    There are pushy and obnoxious Christians, but that’s another matter.

    What atheists and other non-believers are going to find out (and this might even apply to pushy Christians) is that yes, we have a choice to believe or not…but it’s God who is leaving the door open, and God who puts that subtle desire for Him in us.

    There will come a day…soon…when that door will be closed. Then, suddenly, the option of receiving God’s free gift of grace will be gone. (Thes. 2:7 For the mystery of lawlessness is already at work. Only he who now restrains it will do so until he is out of the way.)

    Those that sneer and laugh and mock and corrupt God’s word are going to have the rug pulled out from under them. I hope they see the light before the game’s called on account of darkness.

  17. dan says:

    I don’t believe in atheists…

  18. Bob Roberts says:

    1. an ecclesiastic attached to the chapel of a royal court, college, etc., or to a military unit.

    2. a person who says the prayer, invocation, etc., for an organization or at an assembly.

    Correct me if I’m wrong, but isn’t “atheist chaplain” a complete and obvious contradiction in terms?

  19. Bob Roberts says:

    I’m having a discussion with someone on another forum. He is an atheist and I’m suggesting to him that if he really doesn’t believe there is a God he should try an argument, ANY ARGUMENT, that does not start from the premise “God Exists”. He keeps arguing that I’m silly to expect an atheist not to exclusively use arguments that start with the premise “God exists”.

    It was funny, then boring, now it’s annoying.

  20. kilroy64 says:

    perhaps he doesn’t believe in God but he obviously believes in seconds.

  21. Clingtomyguns says:

    Like homosexual debauchery, the next step is that these self-idolizing heathens want atheism to be recognized, or at least entitled to all of the privileges and benefits, as a religion. To the extent that the US government has been violating the 1st Amendment by endorsing this “religion” far too long, and it will help the pendulum swing back to faith based institutions, and they rejected God in their platform, let’s let atheism become the official religion of the Democratic party. They deserve it. In the mean time, atheists need to pay their fair share.

    “The question is, how do you define a religion?” Schwab asked. “This country gives advantages to groups that define themselves as a religion.”

    A priest’s salary is subsidized by the government because the Catholic Church pays no taxes, he said, but the humanists who now pay Figdor’s salary get no such benefit.

    “It makes a very big difference in the long run,” he said.

    Read more:

  22. DeafPatriot says:

    If a group of mere philosophers gather together, can they demand tax free status and pay someone to “mentor” them while they explore various aspects of philosophy?
    There’s already one, and it’s called a State University Philosophy department. They’re all commies anyway.

  23. Spartan24 says:

    This is just another way of atheists shoving their (dis)belief down everyone else’s throats.

  24. Jimbo says:

    Woo-HOO! Chaplain John Figdor is one fat freaking leach! Do you know how much blood a leach has to suck to get that fat?

  25. Mr Evilwrench says:

    Now hey, wait a minute. I’m an infidel of the purest sort; call me an atheist or an agnostic or whatever, I reject all the labels. But I’m not a proselytizing atheist, yanno? I watched my fiancee’s son do the Christmas program at his church online (not feeling well enough to go today) and I think it’s just fine they go and do their church stuff. You guys, too. Just don’t, you know, paint me into a corner here, ok? We’re not all like that marshmallowy schmuck up there. I’d say he needs his ass kicked, but he’d probably enjoy it too much.

  26. wildman says:

    A belief in nothing is still a belief. what surprises me is that with college costs exploding for what is rapidly becoming a worthless piece of paper, the school has the funds to hire this moron. How many kids were denied scholarships to pay for this moron?

  27. Alan says:

    “nonbelievers can benefit from just about everything religion offers except God … The leaders guide students in whatever way is needed, whether offering advice or organizing events.”

    1) So what DOES this guy do? Counsel? Pray? Listen? Why doesn’t he just become a psychologist or mental-health counselor? Is he ineligible for those titles over some disqualification, say, a felony conviction?

    2) Next step: The University Women Resource Centers, Minority Diversity Counsels, and Gay Rights Groups all need to staffed by straight white men. Riiiiight.

    3) Since the 1960s, the Universal Life Church will ordain almost anybody who believes almost anything (“Do only that which is right”). College kids were granted free ordination certificates believing they’d be exempt from the Vietnam War draft. Mae West, Hugh Hefner, John Lennon, Tori Spelling, and, yes, Madalyn Murray O’Hair are/were all technically “minsters”.

    Sometimes I dislike the US Constitution.

  28. bluffcreek1967 says:

    It never fails: Leftists ALWAYS look creepy, odd and dishevled. I think it’s a reflection of their crazy and weird ideas.

  29. Jodie says:

    I think there is some information missing from the article. When was the reassignment surgery? Which sex is it currently? I don’t know why they they left those details out.

  30. bobdog says:

    He doesn’t use his first name or his title.

    It’s just FIGDOR, son of Ipswich the Boneless, and ruler of the Middle Kingdom of Oz.

    All Hail FIGDOR.

  31. Antisocialist says:

    From the his moms dark basement to the shadows of Stanford…

    always in the dark – atheists

  32. Antisocialist says:

    bobdog you forgot to mention he’s a level 80 atheist panda monk of World of Warcraft greatness.

    Oh well time for FIGDOR the obese to go feed at the all you can eat buffet in the pig den.

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