moonbattery logo

Feb 23 2013

Caption Contest


Leave a comment providing the winning caption to the picture above and win a free t-shirt, suitable for any formal occasion, courtesy of the esteemed countermoonbats at Party Crasher.

The winner will be announced Monday. Free shirts need to be claimed within a week (i.e., I need a US mailing address). T-shirts for the contest are available in blue L or XL only, although white shirts and other sizes are available directly from Party Crasher, along with an excellent selection of other t-shirts guaranteed to cause moonbats to sputter with impotent rage.

Compliments of Bob Z.

220 Responses to “Caption Contest”

  1. hiram says:

    “And when you grow up, here’s how much money you’ll have left after taxes…”

  2. Jodie says:

    Remember kids, be a “doobee” not a “don’t bee”! I see Saul and Frank Marshall…and I see Bill and Bernadine…oh, and look there’s Jeremiah and Valerie…

  3. Sam says:

    See here kids, if you look closely, you can see this is all the Republicans’ fault.

  4. junkyard infidel says:

    “hey, i think i found a few grains of blow from that line i did earlier !”

  5. Restless says:

    A hand-held teleprompter seemed like a good idea in theory…

  6. Xavier says:

    I see the nickel you’re hiding. Put it on the table right now!

  7. Big Bad Bruins says:

    I can see Kenya from here.

  8. Rick the Reb says:

    See that, right where I’m pointing, that’s everything I’ve done so far to help America.

  9. Zim says:

    “Mommy and Daddy voted for this creepy guy?”

  10. C. S. P. Schofield says:

    “Yes, dear, everybody has to pay taxes. Now let’s see your milk money.”

  11. Friedrich Braunschmitt III says:

    You have too much toys comradette we must redistribute. Please place them here.

  12. Musicmaven says:

    “At last, I found that middle class tax cut!”

  13. Jodie says:

    Little girl: Um, Mr. President, why do you have all those weird scars on the side of your head?

  14. DanStlMo says:

    It’s not a mirror Dumb Ass.

  15. Xavier says:

    Barry: Shi’thead, you can be the judge, and La’Trina, you can be Trayvon’s mother. I’ll be the media and focus on this little spot of evidence right here. Sally can be the White Hispanic vigilante.

    Sally: Do I have to get executed again like last time?

  16. chris says:

    Look there! I found the GOP’s balls! Bigger than I thought…

  17. Right Reason says:

    “See, right here, look close … private sector job growth.”

  18. CGW409 says:

    Blonde girl: Dude,I’m like six years old and even I’m not buying the crap you’re spewing.

  19. Xavier says:

    Sally: Shouldn’t you be doing something Presidential?

  20. Xavier says:

    I like this mirror – I’m 2 shades lighter!

  21. Brian says:

    And if you look closely enough, you might actually see my cajones.

  22. Jodie says:

    You see that tiny, tiny speck right there? That’s how big a fetus is. All you do is sweep that little thing away and you won’t be punished with a baby.

  23. Xavier says:

    Barry: Let’s play spot the racist.
    Lil’ Jihad: I see her! I see her!
    Sally: How many times do we have to play this game?

  24. Xavier says:

    Mommy, what does token mean?

  25. Justme says:

    I’m four and even I know you’re full of shit! Who the hell voted for you ?

  26. Artskoe says:

    Prez: “Tell me now, little girl! Do your Mommy and Daddy make 250,000 dollars or not?”

  27. jeff says:

    Obama: “Hold the magnifying glass in a line with the sun like this, put the Constitution down here, and burn that mutha up!”

  28. Xavier says:

    Barry: OK kids, let’s say the table’s a big entitlement pie. Blondie, this little spot’s yours.

    Blondie: I don’t like this game.

    Barry: It’s not a game.

  29. Rat says:

    “Yeah, yeah, yeah…I KNOW it’s a magnifying glass…but when I hold it just like this…I can see MYSELF in it!”

  30. Hexadron says:

    “Ah-HA! Caught you little thoughtcriminals trying to hide a speck from the collective!”

  31. Xavier says:

    Barry: …and under this finger is where I keep the Speaker of the House. He’s so insignificant sometimes I need a magnifying glass to see him!

    Blondie: Dad was right. This guy’s crazy with power.

    Lil’ Jihad: Hush up now. I got my eye on you.

  32. dmgore says:

    And if you look reeeeaaal close, you can see whats left of America’s GDP.

  33. dmgore says:

    if I may enter a second caption….

    (bubble above little girls head) “wow. I’m smarter than this guy”.

  34. Scott Smith says:

    Little girl, I need you to loan me another trillion.

  35. Sweep the leg says:

    My brain fell out. Anyone see it?

  36. Sweep the leg says:

    Wow! This thing makes everything look bigger! What do you guys call this?

  37. atticus90 says:

    And if you look REALLY close, you can see your future!

  38. GoinSane says:

    See? I ruin everything I touch.

  39. Sweep the leg says:

    When the ants burst into flames, picture your future in their place…

  40. Sweep the leg says:

    I’m SERIOUSLY supposed to act like this guy is intelligent? Ain’t gonna happen. How about you, Jamal?

  41. David Kind says:

    Obama: this is a magnifying glass???
    Blonde girl: I am soo not impressed…

  42. Xavier says:

    Blondie: If you look through it backwards it’ll make your wife’s butt look smaller.
    Hmmm, this reminds me: I’m gonna need a scepter.
    Blondie: What do you mean this side of the table is the back of the bus?
    Blondie: You’re just making that up, Mr. President. The Constitution doesn’t say I have to support Lil’ Jihad for life.

    Barry: It’s right here, you just have to use the Presidential looking glass to see what it says.

  43. Flu-Bird says:

    This is not a magifying glass this is a cook stove of the future when all the gas and oil drilling is cut off to save the polarbears

  44. Xavier says:

    ^ Lil Jihad: I can see it!

  45. Hymie Town says:

    Barry: I will apply my laser like focus and shovel ready jobs will appear…here.

  46. Alxandro says:

    “We need to invest on education, so that you kids can learn how to make better mirrors, because this one really sucks.

  47. commander0 says:

    Look how I can vaporize your entire future using only solar energy

  48. Aussi-John says:

    “..and with a high-powered magnifying glass, you can almost see how much the USA means to me…”

  49. Tim Fite says:

    “It’s not a mirror, Mr. President.”

  50. CharlesR says:

    The newest “Green Energy” device but it only works when it’s sunny!

  51. Shooter1001 says:

    FAIR SHARE means you give half of your lunch money to Jamal here! EVERY DAY! He doesn’t have to do anything to earn it. That’s fair!

  52. czekmark says:

    Little girl: How did you ever graduate from kindergarten?

  53. Vic Kelley says:

    obama explains to the kids that their White teacher is racist for having given him a colored magnifying glass.

  54. coal power says:

    if you use one of these before I ban them for causing global warming, you can see all the green jobs we’ve created with the billons of tax dollars I’ve spent

  55. Shooter1001 says:

    Can’t you read without a finger pointing to the words?

  56. Ummah Gummah says:


    I’m Steve Urkel all grown up!


  57. IslandLifer says:

    Some good ones! Lol! I’ve just one thing to say…”STAY OUT OF THE CLASSROOMS YOU PHONY HALFBRED HATE FILLED GUTTER SCUM!!!

  58. Ummah Gummah says:


    Little Blond Girl to herself: “Wow, that’s a pretty big fly on the side of his head”.


  59. STarkFreeorDie says:

    “Romper, bomper, stomper, boo.
    Tell me, tell me, tell me do.
    Magic mirror, tell them this is no play.
    Cause all the kids here are paying their $400K in taxes beginning today

  60. STarkFreeorDie says:

    or as Romper Room did it they named the kids on the show:
    “Romper, bomper, stomper, boo.
    Tell me, tell me, tell me do.
    Magic mirror, tell Janie and Mikey this is no play
    The Taxes Revenues are accruing as of today.

  61. Timmeh says:

    Finally! There’s that nickel from your lemonade stand.

  62. Jeff says:

    One more-
    Bammer: “If you place thousands of these magic wands together it makes the magic energy farm.”
    Sally: “You rode in on a Unicorn didn’t ya”

  63. John says:

    “and this is how you kids will help me find mommy and daddies mean ol’ guns”

  64. wingmann says:

    “So THIS is the guy that’s ruining my future”

  65. epb says:

    “You, Mr. President, are so not cute!”

  66. epb says:

    “He’s so much weirder than most grown-ups.”

  67. epb says:

    “He’s yuckie.”

  68. epb says:

    “I don’t need a magnifying glass to see what a fake you are.”

  69. epb says:

    “I am not a prop, mister!”

  70. CharlesR says:

    little girl to Obama,”What a Putz.”

  71. Ghost of FA Hayek says:

    Now my dear, in the name of progress you must remember to share with those beneath you.
    I think we will start with this one at the bottom

  72. epb says:

    “Like he really cares.” (roll the eyes)

  73. born in 76 says:

    “When I took office, the debt was way down there, so little in todays standard you need a magnifying glass to see it.”

  74. epb says:

    BO: “Hey, kids, let’s play ‘I SPY’!” Me first. “I spy a…

    lil girl: “Dork!”.

    BO: “No. A…”

    lil girl: “A stupid idiot!”

    BO: “No. Now play nice. I spy a…

    lil girl: “A tax you haven’t hiked! An industry you haven’t ruined! Another vacation! A… ”

    BO: I SPY a girl I can’t abort but whose life I’ll ruin!”

  75. shotkidneys says:

    Mister, you are no president.

  76. Buffalobob says:

    Little girl, ” hey mister put your hand on the table and I’ll show you how I burn ants “.

  77. KMiles says:

    “Hey kids, you’ll need one of these to see just how little I care about your future”.

  78. Bieks says:

    “It feels good to finely meet with my job council and search for jobs…”

  79. serfin'usa says:

    Hmmmm, this game sucks. Even with this its impossible to find the Republican’s balls or the Democrat’s brains. Its just not possible!

  80. amarok111 says:

    See that crumb of mechanically separated GMO chicken there? That’s what Moochelle has determined is an appropriate school lunch for you. (We don’t want to risk running out of McNuggets for her. You wouldn’t like her when she’s hungry!)

  81. Zel says:

    The real amount of respect Barry has for the USA.

  82. TheHurtfulTruth says:

    Yep, there it is. You kids see that? That all the bread you’ll be able to afford once I finish wrecking the economy.

  83. Jodie says:

    Okay kids, now let’s pretend that this is a laser and these pencil shavings are jobs. See…look at me…I have a laser-like focus on jobs! Be sure to tell your folks!

  84. Steve Jones says:

    My job as your president to to help all you little people!

  85. Kenny says:

    Sorry, Barry. No change in these pockets.

  86. SNuss says:

    “With this magnifying glass, you can almost see my brain”.

  87. SNuss says:

    “See this speck on the table? That is where the fly on my face pooped.”

  88. Jane says:

    “Looking for the end of his very long nose”

  89. ATEXAN says:

    Sally: Mommy, Why did the man with the funny ears have flys all around him?

  90. SNuss says:

    “How, repeat after me: “Barack Hussein Obama, mmm, mmm, mmm…”

  91. SNuss says:

    Correction: “Now, repeat after me: Barack Hussein Obama, mmm, mmm, mmm…”

  92. big-pete says:

    Look kids, living under a magnifying glass isn’t so bad. Look at that ant, he doesn’t seem to mind, in fact…darn, burned up again. Well, there’s always more ants.

  93. jazbo says:

    “You’re not part of my dependency demographic, little girl. I will burn you like an ant”

  94. SNuss says:

    The new un-reality show: “ObamaYouth C.S.I.”

  95. big-pete says:

    Who’s the fairest of them all?

  96. big-pete says:

    With this my list of accomplishments looks quite impressive.

  97. MidWestFarmer says:

    Well yes but with the magnifying glass you can see I really did reduce the deficit.

  98. Jane says:

    “The young and impressionable, not so impressed”

  99. Jane says:

    “Everything I needed to know, I learned in kindergarten”

  100. Xavier says:

    Lardass won’t let me have a Bic so this is how I light my Kools.

  101. brwaldbaum says:

    Classmates that remember Obama.

  102. Bob Roberts says:

    I don’t think we will be able to find any truth in what I’ve said with this… do you have a microscope handy?

  103. Xavier says:

    Now let me show you how to give a prostate massage.

  104. Dadof3 says:

    “The exact moment little Emily realized grown ups could be full of shit.”

  105. Xavier says:

    Dreyfus: Give me ten men like Clouseau and I could destroy the world.

    (He may have overestimated)

  106. Path says:

    Sorry, I don’t have a clue.

  107. Tchhht!!! says:

    I’m so lovely, I’m so lovely, I’m so lovely, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, laaaaaaaaaaaa…

  108. Xavier says:

    Anybody else think that drawing on the wall looks like Breitbart with a target on his center of mass?

    Exactly what school is this and what are they teaching?

  109. Xavier says:

    There’s a metallic object hanging on a desk (directly over Barry’s head) that has what appear to be bullet dimples from target practice.

    What the hell is going on at this school?

  110. Xavier says:

    In the drawing on the wall, there’s clearly an AR-15, stock down, in Breitbart’s right hand.

    The pieces of the puzzle are starting to fall into place.

  111. Jodie says:

    LOL!I thought the drawing was George Bush, with his body being blown up.

  112. Den says:

    Lice can leap from head to head and eventually infect this entire camp if we are not dilligent.

  113. Scott B says:

    “Hold on… I think I see the economy.”

  114. Jane says:

    “If you can guess what this is, little girl, I’ll give you some candy”

  115. Jane says:

    “If he keeps this up, I’m going to need to be excused”

  116. Piker says:

    “You’re right, Dr. Watson… I don’t have a clue as to how to fix the economy.”

  117. True Blue says:

    0: “And right here is where the Founders gave the President almost unlimited powers to act via Executive Orders.”

    Girl: “Oh great, now he is reading innumerated powers on an imaginary document… this Emperor really is wearing no clothes.”

  118. Jane says:

    “Keep your eye on my finger; it is a powerful indicator of my wishes.”

  119. George says:

    Daddy’s right, this guy is a lazy Mother F’er, Goofing off here with us when he should be creating those jobs he promises every speech.

  120. True Blue says:

    “See all those zero’s kids? Sixteen trillion is a big number. But don’t worry, when I am done ‘fundamentally transforming Amerika’ only the little girl on my left will have to work to repay it all -you other two will get free money from straight from her pocket every month. Now isn’t that fair for everyone!”

  121. SNuss says:

    “I use this to find loopholes in the Constitution”

  122. True Blue says:

    “See kids, if you look really closely, you can see where the Founders crossed out the words ‘shall not be infringed’ and gave me sweeping executive powers.”

  123. SNuss says:

    “Your share of the debt is $390,524.57. Put it right here.”

  124. Tom Chase says:

    “I’m looking for the savings in Obamacare”

  125. Tom Chase says:

    “These are the cut in spending I have proposed”

  126. Tom Chase says:

    “If look closely you can see the truth in my statement”

  127. Tom Chase says:

    “Watch this tiny copy of the Constitution burst into flames”

  128. “Mommy, do I really have to go back to preschool tomorrow? I mean, this really creepy visitor came in today, and …”

  129. Tom Chase says:

    “I’m torturing a tiny Conservative” Tea Partier, Conservative, Constitutional Conservative, Taxpayer,Christian, Republican

  130. SNuss says:

    Correction: “Your share of the debt is $52,643.14. Put it right here.”

    “I want the first installment of your $390,524.57 share of unfunded liabilities. Put it right here.”

  131. Tom Chase says:

    “Look at the jobs I’ve created!!!!”

  132. Scott H says:

    “Then you focus the Sun’s rays like this and catch the money on fire….. just like if it was a bug”

  133. SNuss says:

    “Workin’ on mysteries without any clues”

    Hat tip to Bob Seger-“Night Moves”

  134. Steve says:

    We have a video of the big crash at Daytona posted now…

  135. AJ says:

    “The reason there are no words on it Mr. President, is because it’s a magnifying glass, NOT a hand-held teleprompter like the vice president told you.”

  136. Clink says:

    “Hey kids, ever heard the story of the Grasshopper and the Ant? Well, that ant right there is a Republican. Watch what this grasshopper does to him”.

  137. coregis says:

    Nope,this isn’t the table I lost my virginity on…..

  138. micayden says:

    Yes, I know. My mom and dad voted for you. But, is that all I have left of my future?

  139. Louisiana Steve says:

    It’s true! I’m a vampire!

  140. Jane says:

    “It’s never too early to get out the new vote”

  141. Jane says:

    “Indoctrinate, Indoctrinate, the name of the game.”

  142. AngryK9 says:

    Mirror, mirror in my hand,who’s the greatest in the land?

  143. G. Fox says:

    My Pap Fox was right, you are full of shit! 🙂

  144. AngryK9 says:

    Mirror, mirror in my paw, you can’t own guns, now it’s the law.

  145. AngryK9 says:

    Mirror, mirror in my grip. I won’t go down with the sinking ship.

  146. AngryK9 says:

    Mirror, mirror, in my fist, of my detractors I keep a list.

  147. AngryK9 says:

    Mirror, mirror in my meathook…..oh nevermind. I don’t have anything that rhymes with meathook.

  148. AngryK9 says:

    Mirror, mirror in my meathook, I’ll keep their income that I took.

  149. Jane says:

    “The New Fairy Tales”

  150. Jane says:

    “It’s right there; would I lie to you?”

  151. Vermin says:

    So you say this is called a table?

  152. Deadweezyl says:

    Can you help me find my economics? It was right here….

  153. Rainbow Utopia says:

    Aren’t these cool kids? I got these from my buddies at Solyndra. Yours for only 600,000$ each.

  154. Bill T says:

    Who let this DWEEB into our classroom for show and tell?

  155. berlet98 says:

    “Umm, well, first of all the little black boy is smarter and better-looking than that honkie white kid.”

  156. LyleLovett666 says:

    No kidding.This is really the size of bidens brain.

  157. Mop says:

    Look that is how much money i’ll leave you.

  158. ThisObamaNation says:

    Obama appears to be looking for a clue.

  159. Joe C says:

    Barack examines the children closely to see just how much more debt the next generation might be able handle.

  160. Q Man says:

    Wait…wait…I can almost see those promised spending cuts.

  161. John Charles says:

    Little girl saying to herself: “This doofis runs the country!?!”

  162. WTSherman1864 says:

    See my royal booger? It’s a good snack, kids!

  163. 1200intell says:

    “…so this is how much we cut government spending and then the “Media Filters” make it look bigger than it really is…”

  164. Trickydick says:

    See right there !! that’s the hut I was born in, in Kenya.

  165. 4farms says:

    if you look through this magnifying glass you’ll see what’s left of your parent’s America – but I’m working on that tiny bit too.

  166. Alexis says:

    The future will not belong to those who have white skin and blond hair.

  167. nraendowment says:

    That tiny vanishing speck? That’s your future.

  168. Gail Vigil says:

    “Heeeeeey, this ain’t my Teleprompter…..”

  169. Mr Evilwrench says:

    Mom, I was sick of Bronco Bama already, then he showed up at my school.

  170. Mr Evilwrench says:

    Kids, this is a magnifying glass. With this you can see me magnified in my true glory.

  171. WhiteFalcon1 says:

    There it is….right there, your very last civil right!

  172. csanad says:

    If I had a bicep, it would look just like young Trayvon’s head over here.

  173. Rubie Styles says:

    Portrait of America: Two Children…One will grow up to resist government tyranny, the other will not.

  174. Bill Jones says:

    At the end of my second term you’ll have this much.

  175. Sarge says:

    No, I can’t find any place to make cuts!”

  176. GoinSane says:

    My first attempt was a quote, so here’s a caption:

    President Obama discovers break through technology that magically increases size of federal budget. Racist Tea Party critic questions president’s intelligence.

  177. chester arthur says:

    Look,right there,you can see my spending cuts.

  178. Hillman says:

    Look real hard little Jethro. That’s all that will be left for the little white girl when we get down looting her kind to pay for all of our wants and needs.

  179. coregis says:

    “I can see my morals with this!”

  180. RayNAiken says:

    Little Girl: “I don’t need a stinking magnifying glass to see you are full of caca del toro.”

  181. Jeffrey Morgan says:

    Look very closely children, you can see my integrity.

  182. Rusty Bill says:

    See that tiny spot? That’s my integrity.

  183. Rusty Bill says:

    Sorry, Jeff. I just popped mt response in before reading the prior thread.

  184. Rusty Bill says:


    I need another cup of coffee…

  185. elizabeth says:

    And who’s the prettiest President of them all? Me, of course.

    5 year old Madison is NOT impressed.

  186. Ricardo says:

    You’re right Buckwheat she is a honkie.

  187. SparkyWT says:

    This is how we burn the Constitution using the awesome free power provided by the sun, augmented by Me.

  188. Joseph Heckmann says:

    That’s not a mirror dumbass!

  189. Maudie N Mandeville says:

    Is that your last dime?

  190. whipplebear says:

    Is this idiot for real?

  191. DJ says:

    Little white girl: I’m feeling sick in my tummy. Bronko Bama smells like a poopy diaper

  192. Brian_Boru says:

    “See kids, with a little sunlight, you can burn a hole right through the Constitution.”

  193. fiona says:

    “Mirror, mirror, in my hand, who’s the koolest in the land?”

  194. Comrade Kulak says:

    Comrades I’m looking for those Polish death camps in all 57 states because a corpseman is missing.

  195. nick says:

    ya see kids, i promised mr. soro i’d be “Billy Madison” today.

  196. nick says:

    ya see kids, i promised mr. soros id be “Billiy madison” today

  197. nick says:

    see me kids going through the budget line by line, just like i promised your dumb assed parents

  198. nick says:

    the table kids are thinkin..”why does shit head get the real one”

  199. nick says:

    and on a lighter note today, president obama showed some kindergartner’s the fine art of fingerpointing

  200. nick says:

    here is president obama today, trying to explain to kindergartners what communism is while holding a magnifying glass, and pointing to the table for no apparent reason

  201. JOHN says:


  202. jc14 says:

    Little blonde girl: “Man, is this Doofus really the President? I need to go home and shoot my parents, both of whom actually voted for this dolt.
    “Miss Patterson! Can I get a hall pass? Gotta run home for a minute . . .”

  203. Jon Brooks says:

    “And this is how you’ll have to find America when you grow up kids, after I’m done.”

  204. Mag26 says:

    Snack time under Moochelle

  205. Frank says:

    (thought-cloud from little girl): “What an asshole!”

  206. Jane says:

    “She says. ‘Call me doubtful'”

  207. epb says:

    “You got really big ears. That mole is ugly looking. Leave my stuff alone.”
    (Kids say the darndest things)

  208. Ivey Parker says:

    “There’s still a speck of dignity left on you, young American. I’ll get to work right away on removing it.”

  209. Zack R says:

    Using this, you can see how I drastically reduced the national debt by making the needed cuts to our welfare system. Just kidding, we’ll need to break out the microscope.

  210. Jinks says:

    I hold in my hand “change” You will need it to find “hope”

  211. WTSherman1864 says:

    Choom! Intercepted! Don’t bogart my booger!

  212. Sam Adams says:

    And this is how I look through each line of each bill to eliminate waste, fraud, and abuse.

  213. Stick says:

    See, right there, there ARE Sequester cuts.

  214. Jim S says:

    I’ve found it!!!!!! Joe Biden’s last remaining brain cell.

  215. bill iiams says:

    how much bull do i have to listen to

  216. IOpian says:

    Blondie: What’s the matter with grownups.. is this the bestest person they could find to be President?

  217. DoorGunner says:

    Sorry for the late entry,

    There, see, it’s my soul, right there!

Alibi3col theme by Themocracy