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Mar 22 2012

Children Banned From Having Best Friends

Being a totalitarian ideology, moonbattery imposes itself everywhere imaginable. Egalitarian inclusiveness and the prohibition of all potential pain now demand that British schoolchildren not have best friends:

Instead, the primary pupils are being encouraged to play in large groups.

Educational psychologist Gaynor Sbuttoni said the policy has been used at schools in Kingston, South West London, and Surrey.

She added: “I have noticed that teachers tell children they shouldn’t have a best friend and that everyone should play together.

“They are doing it because they want to save the child the pain of splitting up from their best friend. But it is natural for some children to want a best friend. If they break up, they have to feel the pain because they’re learning to deal with it.”

Russell Hobby, of the National Association of Head Teachers, confirmed some schools were adopting best-friend bans.

By the same logic, romantic relationships will be banned, on the pretext that feelings will be hurt if they don’t work out. Here again George Orwell showed amazing prescience; in 1984, Winston Smith had to conduct his romance with Julia in secrecy, and got in big trouble with the government discovered it.

Other than taking pain avoidance to the last extreme of absurdity, why would liberals want to proscribe close personal relationships between members of the herd? For the same reason they have been methodically destroying the family through welfare and the farcification of marriage in the name of “gay rights.” A slave’s only meaningful relationship should be with his master: Big Government.

Obama could have been spared the pain of parting from Reggie Love.

On tips from Agnostic Conservative, Dave H, and Mattius Maximus.

7 Responses to “Children Banned From Having Best Friends”

  1. nobarack08 says:

    must that ‘collective’ mentality of moonbattiness.

  2. whotothewhat says:

    And we all know what happens when you start messing with British Kids, you get creepy scary British kids.

    Village Of The Damned.

  3. son of a preacher man says:

    In keeping with the Orwell theme. Another benefit of your superiors not allowing you to have a best friend. You won’t feel bad when your buddy is shipped off to the glue factory b/c he no longer serves a useful purpose to the collective.

  4. So Cal Jim says:

    What in the hell is wrong with the Englsh? Why do they put up with that insanity?

  5. Dan says:

    Guess what happens when a group of boys are told to play with somebody they do not like, Johnny gets the crap beat out of him after school. Then they will scream bullying.

  6. katiep says:

    How… How did the Brits go from Winston Churchill to this? They’ve become more like the French than the French…

    Europe, I weep for you.

  7. Robert Peahl says:

    Used to be a decent place to vacation in, but it’s getting so bad the woman and I haven’t been there in 6 years. They need Thatcher back.
    One thing they are still good at is organizational names.
    “National Association of Head Teachers”? LOL.

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