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Mar 30 2014

Liberal Egalitarianism Applied to Baseball Seating

Liberal ideology works well when applied to lawn care. So that each blade of grass is equal, those that would grow taller are cut down until they stand no higher than the shortest blade. This makes for a smooth and uniform lawn. But liberalism doesn’t work as well when applied to seating at high school sports events:

A new set of seating is being torn down outside the Plymouth [Michigan] Wildcats varsity boys’ baseball field, not long before the season begins, because the fields for boys’ and girls’ athletics must be equal.

A group of parents raised money for a raised seating deck by the field, as it was hard to see the games through a chain-link fence. The parents even did the installation themselves, and also paid for a new scoreboard.

But, after a complaint, the U.S Education Department’s Office for Civil Rights investigated the new addition and says it must be torn down. It says the facility was no longer equal to the girls’ softball field next door, which has old bleachers and an old scoreboard.

There you have it: federally inflicted equality in a nutshell. Applied to wealth creation, this summarizes Obama’s economic policy.

On tips from R F and Shawn R.



14 Responses to “Liberal Egalitarianism Applied to Baseball Seating”

  1. Callawyn says:

    After they tear down the bleachers for the boy’s field, complain that the girls have an unfair advantage: they have old bleachers while the boys have nothing. Get them torn down also.

  2. Callawyn says:

    After they tear down the bleachers for the boy’s field, complain that the girls have an unfair advantage: they have old bleachers while the boys have nothing. Get them torn down also.

  3. W2LJ says:

    That won’t work. Girls are allowed to have advantages over boys. It makes up for all the years of oppression.

  4. W2LJ says:

    That won’t work. Girls are allowed to have advantages over boys. It makes up for all the years of oppression.

  5. TED says:

    Feelings only make sense to the ones having them. Feelings and sense are
    opposites.

  6. TED says:

    Feelings only make sense to the ones having them. Feelings and sense are
    opposites.

  7. ClinkinKY says:

    I guess it would make too much sense to have boys and girls share the same field. I’m sure that some scheduling conflicts could be worked out. But then you’ll have someone complain about which team plays earlier. Scratch that idea:)

  8. ClinkinKY says:

    I guess it would make too much sense to have boys and girls share the same field. I’m sure that some scheduling conflicts could be worked out. But then you’ll have someone complain about which team plays earlier. Scratch that idea:)

  9. wingmann says:

    But,but it’s for the children.

  10. wingmann says:

    But,but it’s for the children.

  11. Sir_Loinsteak says:

    If there’s a black parent involved, he/she needs to step forward and denounce the destruction of the new bleachers as racist.
    If the parent is gay and female, so much the better.

  12. Lonesome Polecat says:

    If there’s a black parent involved, he/she needs to step forward and denounce the destruction of the new bleachers as racist.
    If the parent is gay and female, so much the better.

  13. RayNAiken says:

    Take all the bleachers out. That way no one would have a better seat or a higher one than anyone else. AND! No separate fields. Take turns using the same field. And oh yeah girls should have the same uniform and wear jock straps like the boys. Uniformity must prevail!!!

    Shouldn’t we be hiring the brightest educators/administers for our children instead of the current crop of dummies?
    One question? Did someone prevent the girls from fund raising for their seats?

  14. RayNAiken says:

    Take all the bleachers out. That way no one would have a better seat or a higher one than anyone else. AND! No separate fields. Take turns using the same field. And oh yeah girls should have the same uniform and wear jock straps like the boys. Uniformity must prevail!!!

    Shouldn’t we be hiring the brightest educators/administers for our children instead of the current crop of dummies?
    One question? Did someone prevent the girls from fund raising for their seats?

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