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Nov 30 2016

California Cracks Down on Flatulating Cows

Consider the senseless repressiveness of an America in which there is no opposition to left-wing Democrats. You don’t need to use your imagination. Just look to the single-party state of California, where ideologically justified micromanagement has reached such an extreme of absurdity that a cow can’t fart unregulated:

Gov. Jerry Brown signed legislation in September that for the first time regulates heat-trapping gases from livestock operations and landfills.

Cattle and other farm animals are major sources of methane, a greenhouse gas many times more potent than carbon dioxide as a heat-trapping gas. Methane is released when they belch, pass gas and make manure.

Another “greenhouse gas” that is more significant than carbon dioxide is water vapor. Good thing for cows that they don’t take hot showers, which ecofascists will come after soon.

“If we can reduce emissions of methane, we can really help to slow global warming,” said Ryan McCarthy, a science adviser for the California Air Resources Board, which is drawing up rules to implement the new law.

Authorities believe they can control the weather by forcing farmers to contain methane from manure in giant tanks. Someone should have told them they could control it by the comparably effective technique of standing on their heads in the manure.

Livestock are responsible for 14.5 percent of human-induced greenhouse gas emissions, with beef and dairy production accounting for the bulk of it, according to a 2013 United Nations report.

Pointy-headed UN oligarchs don’t like us eating meat. They want us eating bugs instead. Hopefully bugs don’t fart much, or California will crack down on them too.

California produces more milk than any other state. But not for long, with moonbats in charge.

In case there is anyone out there who literally believes that containing methane from California cows will improve the weather,

“Dairies are moving out of state to places where these costs don’t exist,” said Paul Sousa, director of environmental services for Western United Dairymen.

The dairy industry could be forced to move production to states and countries with fewer regulations, leading to higher emissions globally, Sousa said.

But at least Governor Moonbeam will be able to posture righteously as he drives an important industry out of his state.

On tips from Bodhisattva and TCS III.

20 Responses to “California Cracks Down on Flatulating Cows”

  1. Chi Huavara says:

    What is the carbon footprint on the petroleum products required to manufacture fart packs?

  2. EVERYDAY PRESIDENT ☆ ᵀᴿᵁᴹᴾ says:

    Can they strap on of those on Hillary? She’ll take off like the Hilldenburgh..

  3. EVERYDAY PRESIDENT ☆ ᵀᴿᵁᴹᴾ says:

    Wisconsin cracks down on common sense:

    UW-Madison participates in Islam appreciation week

    This is AFTER the jihadist attack on OSU !

  4. KirklesWorth says:

    Looks like the end of “global warming” is nigh if this little trick works:

    National Geographic: A Sprinkle of Seaweed Could Deflate Gassy Cows

  5. Jack Bauer says:

    Since the election there have been rumblings in California about secession….

    Insofar as I’m concerned, it can’t happen fast enough.
    These moonbat morons are running up tremendous state debt trying to maintain their socialist empire there. I for one, do not want to pay one cent to bail these idiots out because of all their bad decisions.

    So buh-bye Cali…..don’t let the door hit you in the ass. Good riddance!
    Maybe they can make their own cars then too, allowing the car manufacturers to just make one version for the U.S., instead of having to always make a special version for the “special” people in Mexifornia.

    Can’t wait for the fun of watching them try to build their own army, navy, and air force…

  6. Oh, where to begin…

    1) Methane digestion can produce usable bio-gas; however, the process is economically viable only if an operation can use bio-gas AND if piped gas is unavailable. Of course, moonbats in the Commiefornia legislature will shut down mineral gas production to make bio-gas more competitive. That may be the end-game.

    2) Human sewage produces methane, too; will Commiefornia force people to stop consuming cabbage, sauerkraut, beans, and beer?

    3) Anybody remember that scene from “All Creatures Great and Small” where Dr. Herriot lances a cow with bloat and the idiot farmer lights the escaping gas, which promptly explodes?

  7. The only problem with secession is that the Chi-coms would take over in about a year. Imagine Cuba with a land border on our West Coast…

  8. They’ll synthesize the plastic from bio-gas, at ten times the cost or more…

  9. Andy says:

    I guess we should slaughter Caribou, wildebeast and zebra herds to help cut down on the gas. Hmmmmm what else can we get rid of? Hey wait a minute. If a cow farts and I fart isn’t that about the same thing? It’s only a matter of time before they put air tight diapers on us all and be proud of their noble accomplishments.

  10. KHarn says:

    Just a suggestion:
    1; Eat more meat to get rid of the livestock.
    2; Fine/Tax vegans for not doing their part to eliminate farting animals.

  11. SNuss says:

    It would be far better for the environment, and for Americans in general, if we severely limited the oral flatulence produced by Leftist politicians.

  12. Guy Fawkes says:

    Politicians from California, as elsewhere, have a complete lack of common sense.
    As do all Climate Changers.
    At the rate they are going they will ban the sale of beans.
    Let’s apply a little common sense.
    Before the 1800’s 60,000,000 buffalo roamed the Great Plains.
    Was it hotter then?
    Don’t think so.
    Just my opinion
    Guy Fawkes

  13. just_one_Deplorable_guy says:

    WTF??? Just when I thought lefties couldn’t get any dumber, or have their heads shoved up their asses any further, along comes something to prove me wrong.

  14. 762x51 says:

    Not so long as you are around to pollute the atmosphere with your verbal diarrhea, princess jerklesTwerp.r

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  16. KirklesWorth says:

    And of course, the imbecile has to chime in with an attempt at an “insult”. It obviously wants me to remind people about its “stellar intellect” saying:

    762×51: Not only is tRump a surefire loser but he will also cause the loss of the Senate and possibly even the House. The Trumpanzee Progressives have done what they set out to do, elect Hillary Clinton.

  17. 762x51 says:

    My insult was completely on topic, jackass.

    Insults are all you deserve, princess.

    Hey jerkles, how’s that Goldman Sachs / George Soros Treasury Secretary sitting with you? After all your idiotic BS about tRump being an outsider. LMAO. Good thing we don’t have Shitlery, she might have put a globalist in as Treasury Sec. Oh wait, your cult leader did just that. Yeah, this waaaayyy better, douchebag.

  18. KirklesWorth says:

    You’re absolutely right – Hillary would have been “waaaayyy better, douchebag.” But then again, progressives are your heroes so it’s no wonder you wanted our government packed with them.

  19. 762x51 says:

    Where did I say I believe in global warming princess? Your tenuous grip on reality is slipping even more.

    The point, simpleton was that your cult leader is doing exactly what I said he would do and picking a bunch of Progressives for his government. With the exceptions of Gen. Mattis and Gen Kelly, the rest are either globalist Progressives or InfoWars nutjobs like you.

    Making up BS about me won’t change that you dirty little twerp bastard.

  20. KirklesWorth says:

    So, you finally decide to respond when nobody is watching. So be it. Since you now seem to agree with my original post that said:

    Looks like the end of “global warming” is nigh if this little trick works:

    National Geographic: A Sprinkle of Seaweed Could Deflate Gassy Cows

    So I will thank you for the agreement. Now it’s just a matter of illustrating how you use the Alinsky’s Rules for Radicals #5 of attacking someone like a good little progressive. Why don’t you tout what your preferred candidate Hillary would be doing…?

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