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May 17 2016

Hate Hoaxing Homosexual Pastor Jordan Brown Drops Lawsuit

Let’s have a little follow-up on Jordan Brown, the pervert pastor who thought he could acquire some positive publicity for his church of sin by accusing Whole Foods of writing the forbidden word “fag” on his cake, but who only managed to land on the Hate Hoax List. The unholy reverend admits that the game is up:

The man who accused Whole Foods Market of writing a homophobic slur on a cake will drop a lawsuit against the grocery chain.

“The company did nothing wrong,” Jordan Brown, a pastor of a small Austin church, said in a statement. “I was wrong to pursue this matter and use the media to perpetuate this story.”

Brown had sued Whole Foods on April 18, announcing the lawsuit publicly while flanked by his lawyers. He emotionally told reporters that he had ordered a cake with “Love wins” written in frosting, Brown said. The cake he picked up, he said, had a homophobic slur on it.

Whole Foods fired back almost immediately, releasing surveillance footage of Brown purchasing the cake — evidence, the grocery chain said, showed that Brown was lying. The company filed a counter suit against Brown.

Whole Foods has dropped its countersuit, now that Brown has dropped the initial suit. This is one reason it is nice to be a huge corporation that can afford good lawyers. Hate hoaxers would be wise to pick on family-owned businesses.

Brown is the noisily gay pastor at the Church of Open Doors in Austin (a.k.a. Moscow on the Colorado). Chances are good that his sermons deviate from Scripture.

From the beginning, the idea of anyone in moonbatty Austin discriminating against homosexuals did not pass the laugh test. It didn’t help that the person who prepared the cake was another member of the LGBTXYZPDQ community.

Apparently no charges will be filed, despite Brown obviously having put “fag” on the cake himself before filing suit under false pretenses. Hate hoaxes are popular largely because there are rarely any consequences even if they are exposed. After all, the hoaxers mean well and are raising awareness about the horrors of imaginary oppression.

Jordan Brown, faux victim, is consoled.

On tips from TCS III, Dave F, Torcer, Nobama, Steve A, Dean D, Stormfax, DR, and Chronos Z Wonderpig.

19 Responses to “Hate Hoaxing Homosexual Pastor Jordan Brown Drops Lawsuit”

  1. Danny K says:

    I hope he is at least made to pay the allocated costs of WF’s legal fees.

  2. KHarn says:

    “Jordan Brown, faux victim, is consoled.”
    “Laying on of hands to exorcise the demons.”

  3. Wilberforce says:

    I’d still sue him to recoup damages. Every last penny.

  4. smokintoad says:

    Maybe he jumped the gun on the coming executive order directing that “The End Justifies the Means” will be replacing “Thou Shalt not Bear False Witness”.

  5. Mr. Freemarket says:

    Not a chance. There is little doubt that Whole Foods legal bill is at least in the five figures right now, and may even be six figures.

    I doubt that the Church of Open Doors could come up with more than a couple thousand dollars.

  6. Stosh says:

    If he did the lettering himself, then the LGBTXYZPDQ community just needs to accept the fact he “identifies” as a fag. Isn’t what someone “identifies” as the most important of qualities?

  7. Donna M says:

    So that’s what he looks like.
    Shows on his face.
    Just another “pastor”, leading his itty-bitty, li’l flock,
    In the li’l, wayward church, of the “damned” no good.

  8. NotKennedy says:

    If he had just defaulted on a “student” loan, there might not be any assets to pursue. However… the court would be at liberty in respect of his having made false attestations. There are actual damages as a result of the reverend’s malice of forethought.

    Take the high road on this one. If any sinner can repent, even a homosexual racist can repent and expect forgiveness. Satan cannot repent. And I am not real sure about John Edwards, the former John Kerry VP candidate.

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  10. Gex says:

    Disappointing that Whole Foods dropped the countersuit

  11. BarksintheCountry says:

    One reason these people continue to get away with this noxious behavior and attempts to ruin others is that the sane people don’t pursue them to the end of the earth. WF should sue him and any subsequent generations into permanent poverty.

  12. Mr. Freemarket says:

    The first step down the road of repentance is acknowledging that you have done wrong. Those on the left aren’t so good at that.

  13. Donna M says:

    More likely,
    He may be gettin’, some more added.
    Back ups and replacements to the legion, already there!
    After all, they’re one big, “happy” family!

  14. Donna M says:

    After all, it’s the church of open doors!
    Things fly in and out, apparently, all the time!

  15. Silence Dogood says:

    The loser deleted his twitter account… Go figure.

  16. rex freeway says:

    I hope his lawyers broke it off in his ass.

  17. Matthew Ouyang says:

    bye-bye to the church’s Facebook account too

  18. RicoSuaveGuapo says:

    Leftists gotta stick together. No bad tactics, only bad targets.

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