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Jul 03 2012

Moonbat Tech: The Eggasus

In light of Benedict Roberts’s ruling that the federal government can force us to buy products of its choosing, make room in your budget for an Eggasus:

Eggasus is designed for one person only, with the driver protected from the elements by an all-weather enclosure, which gives the vehicle its egg shape. Underneath the shell is a three-wheeled electric vehicle, fitted with an electric hub motor in the front wheel, enclosed cab, tinted windows, a seat, and instrument display panel.

It reaches a range of up to 50 miles (80.4 kilometers), with a top speed of 25 mph (40.23 km/h).

The glorified scooters are currently selling for $5,000 apiece, but no doubt will be much cheaper once government subsidies are fully applied. If you still can’t afford one, the Obama Regime will be happy to force someone else to purchase one on your behalf.

Please tell me this is a joke.

On a tip from Air2air.

40 Responses to “Moonbat Tech: The Eggasus”

  1. WhereIsOurPinochet says:

    Nah, that thing’s not gonna tip over.

  2. QuietMan says:

    Gust of wind….

  3. StanInTexas says:

    There is one of those things hung-up in the grill of my Jeep.

    …I thought it was a tennis ball!

  4. AC says:

    Available options include caskets and cemetery plots.

  5. jazbo says:

    Now available at the Scooter Store and Medicaid will pay for asll of it.

    The cripple-chair with a lid.

  6. Ghost of FA Hayek says:

    It appears to be lunchtime for the F350 diesel

  7. chuck in st paul says:

    I’m sure that’ll work well here in Teh Peoples Republic of Minnesota during the winter. ha ha ha ha ha. Yeah. Sure. And where the heck do you go at 25mph that you don’t get blown off the road?

  8. mojo says:

    If somebody thinks that thing will pass even a cursory safety inspection, I’ve got a bridge to sell them.

  9. Judith M. says:

    It looks like a pencil sharpener.

  10. Unonymous says:

    I think I saw that in a Woody Allen movie once.

  11. Anon-Y-Mouse says:

    If there was ever any doubt that progressives loath themselves, have a desire for humiliation and ultimately crave death, this should answer that question.

  12. Sam says:

    I had the same idea when I was seven and had to ride my bike home from school in a downpour. Even then, I realized it would make the rider look like a douchenozzle.

  13. KHarn says:

    It looks like a full-body motorcycle helmet for the ultra-safety goofballs.

  14. Justin says:

    People make jokes about smartcars getting flattened by real cars in a collision but I’d be worried about hitting a pedestrian in that thing.

  15. Dan says:

    Straight from the planet Ork. Mork (Mork and Mindy) who comes to Earth from the planet Ork in a small, one-man egg-shaped spaceship.

  16. fugazi says:

    25mph? Really? Where can you drive at that speed? Even if I was douchy enough to want one of these I could not traveltowork at 25mph. Who the hell can?

  17. hiram says:

    I saw one of those little Indian “TaTa” things on HWY 65 in Arkansas (of all places!) the other day. It looked like a Volvo-level paragon of safety compared to this gigantic Modern Art ‘sculpture’ of Chris Matthew’s head…

  18. Mr Evilwrench says:

    But it has tinted windows, and a seat! That’s, um, kinda cool, isn’t it?

  19. James McEnanly says:

    The thing looks like it would get very hot inside if in direct sunlight.You get the impression that they are meant to be driven indoors.

  20. QuietMan says:

    Hiram, was it in Conway, AR? SF has no claim to more Moonbats per capita.

  21. CGW409 says:

    Yee gawds that thing makes the Reliant Robin (search BBC’s Top Gear)look as safe and stable as a Humvee.
    On the plus side it does give Smart car drivers something slower and more of a death trap to crush on the roads.

  22. Python says:

    Ha ha I can see these things pushed over by the kids in all the shopping centre car parks. We’ve got cow-tipping now it will be car-tipping.

  23. dan says:

    where would you put the Hopey Changey sticker ?

    Reminds me of my dog’s squeaky toy…

  24. Jodie says:

    I visualize a “My Little Brony” type driving that symbol of liberal progress.

  25. WhereIsOurPinochet says:

    All joking aside, this is actually the perfect vehicle for the European-style New Urbanist inner cities the progressives want us to move into (presumably after razing our existing cities as part of some kind of economic stimulus, cos like, sprawl is bad and stuff). Nothing else would really fit on those 8 foot wide streets. With the family totally decimated and everyone single and childless, there will be no need for extra seats.

    This thing would never pass the hipster test, though; I see brake levers.

  26. Lazlo says:

    @ WhereIsOurPinochet

    Hipsters are into coaster brakes, but you’ve probaly never heard of them.

  27. […] the Obama Regime will be happy to force someone else to purchase one on your behalf.  Read more at Moonbattery. Share this:TwitterFacebookLike this:LikeBe the first to like […]

  28. SNuss says:

    If you hooked a bunch of them in line, they would look like the caterpillar in a Disney parade.

    BTW, I don’t see any airbags. I wonder what it (and it’s occupant) would look like after a barrier test?
    Can you say “Humpty Dumpty”? I knew you could.

  29. 70Stage1 says:

    I think if you stood on the brakes hard enough, it’d roll like a ball. That is if it could get past walking speed. Morons.

  30. wingmann says:

    You have to crack a few Eggasus to make an omelet.

  31. James says:

    Don’t laugh. BO has already decreed that car companies must achieve a fleet standard of an 54.5 MPG by 2025. So unless car companies discover some type of new magic pixie dust to fuel our cars, this is the car of the future– overpriced, underpowered, dangerously lightweight vehicles such as this. He already forced the industry in 2009 to a ridiculously high 35.5 MPG.

    I’m still shocked about how little outrage was expressed over this, even among conservatives.

  32. James says:

    Sadly, most Americans have been asleep at the wheel on this issue. It won’t be long before pickup trucks aren’t even available (except for maybe for insanely high prices). That’s when you’ll see the public finally take notice. Here in Texas, it’s likely to create a civil war. Maybe that’s what we need.

  33. Darem says:

    If I knew that supporting free enterprise would cause people to invent things like this, I’d have turned commie a long time ago! Anyone who tries to make money off of things that those dirty libs like is not American! We need a good conservative in office who can regulate these things out of existence! Wouldn’t be surprised if this was included in obummercare! We should destroy any dealership that tries to sell this libtarded monstrosity. It takes away our freedom to allow people to have things like this!

  34. 4-8-15-16-23-42 says:

    Looks like a giant Obamacare anal suppository.

  35. Elizabeth says:

    quick story from my j-o-b

    upset client: Why is my mini-flooper sooo expensive to insure? It gets 50 mpg!!!

    Me: We end up paying out a lot in medical expenses when a minor fender bender permanently disables you.

    I swear, most people have lost common sense. Driving is about the most dangerous thing you do on a daily basis. But go ahead, save a little in gas money and feel good about your green moonbat soul.

  36. Amazed says:

    In a Michigan winter? Not a chance in hell.

  37. Noelegy says:

    “Protected from the elements,” but to quote the jerk boyfriend in “Crocodile Dundee,” a fast-movin’ Chevy’ll sure make a mess of ya.

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