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Feb 17 2018

Switzerland Bans Boiling Lobsters

Not even Switzerland has managed to stand apart from the rising tide of moonbattery:

A law goes into effect March 1 that bans the common cooking method of tossing a live lobster into a big pot of boiling water, quickly killing the tasty crustacean. That practice is being outlawed because the Swiss say it’s cruel and lobsters can sense pain.

Among the better informed, even moonbats doubt that lobsters can feel pain. Despite having much larger bodies, they have brains the size of a grasshopper’s (I mean lobsters do; moonbat brains might be smaller).

But this isn’t about sea cockroaches, the consumption of which is negligible in landlocked Switzerland. This is about moonbats reminding us that they make most of the rules, and that they will always side with the Other against you, even if the Other is barely more sentient than a plant.

Lobsters also must be transported in seawater rather than on ice.

Violators of the insane law could get 3 years in prison. Other provisions include:

[C]ats must have a daily visual contact with other felines, and hamsters or guinea pigs must be kept in pairs. And anyone who flushes a pet goldfish down the toilet is breaking the law.

Also, it will be illegal to punish a dog for barking. Seriously. But as far as I know, housetraining dogs is still legal for now.

On a tip from ou812.

16 Responses to “Switzerland Bans Boiling Lobsters”

  1. Frank says:

    Is there any law against boiling democRATs? Oh, wait! They wisely don’t allow them inside their borders!

  2. MAS says:

    But you can slaughter babies right up to the last second before birth right?

  3. SolidusRaccoon says:

    Bet it is ok to honor kill your wife and daughters.

  4. Aesop says:

    The Swiss have finally, irretrievably lost whatever minds they ever had.

  5. Ol' Uncle Lar says:

    More fine work by the people who like to push other people around and have found a socially acceptable way to do it.

  6. Saxon Warrior says:

    I’d rather boil a moonbat than a lobster. I’m not cruel, but moonbats have smaller brains than lobsters.
    No…wait. I take that back. I’d rather boil a lobster. A lobster is probably tastier and more nutritious. A lobster has value as food. Moonbats are completely useless and serve less purpose than houseflies and maggots do.
    In fact, while I am asking… What are moonbats for? Does anybody really know?

  7. Saxon Warrior says:

    Well, they are a mountain country, surrounded by Alpine peaks that protected them from Popish tyranny during the Protestant Reformation.
    Their love of personal gun ownership protected them from Nazi invasion during WW2.
    Despite their lack of natural resources, they manage to feed themselves and still make great cheese, chocolate and cuckoo clocks. They know how to manage their finances, know how to run banks, and have a high standard of living.
    What could possibly destroy them?
    Oh yes…. I forgot…. Moonbattery can destroy them.
    Moonbattery is the slow cancer of the world!

  8. Grumpy Cat says:

    To feed maggots.

  9. Grumpy Cat says:

    To the credit of the Swiss they don’t tolerate that sh*t. But their neighbors to the north, south, east and west of them, that’s another story.

  10. Valarie says:

    Gℴℴgle is paying you 97 US dollars hourly to complete few jobs working off of a home computer .. Work only for only few hours daily and enjoy greater time together with your own friends . You can do this limited offer!!!last Monday I bought a brand new Lotus Esprit after I been getting $17814 this last month .it looks the easiest job but you could not forgive yourself if you do not view it.!ae062x:=>=> http://GoogleFreshWorkAtHome/getcash/98$/perhour ♥♥♥e♥♥♥u♥♥h♥♥w♥x♥♥m♥♥n♥♥♥f♥o♥x♥c♥m♥♥♥x♥♥♥y♥f♥o♥♥♥a♥p♥♥t♥♥v♥c♥m♥y♥♥n♥♥y::!me063u:kueqjs

  11. Frank says:

    Hey “Dana,” Has anyone fallen for your silly spam? How many aliases do you use?

  12. Dan T says:

    Does this mean they are now pro-life when it comes to abortion? Hey, I’d call that progress.

  13. Otis Donkey says:

    “A law goes into effect March 1 that bans the common cooking method of tossing a live lobster into a big pot of boiling water, quickly killing the tasty crustacean.”

    1. how is this going to be enforced?

    2. what is the preferred method of killing the lobster pre-boil? something slow and painful like halal slaughter that maximizes the rush of adrenaline making the meat unpalatable?

    Or our enemies need to be assured that we (the swiss) are completely conquered by their own government.

    “[C]ats must have a daily visual contact with other felines, and hamsters or guinea pigs must be kept in pairs.”

    … a few years down the road.. Switzerland unable to deal with the overpopulation of feral guinea pigs and hamsters, decides to migrate to Africa which is slightly less populated by vermin.

  14. Carolyn Bubb says:

    Gℴogle paying all people $99/hr to complete few services with a laptop .. Do work only for just few hours in a whole day and spend more time with your own loved ones … Any person can also join this best career!!on weekend I purchased a great Mercedes-Benz S-class just after getting $12654 last four weeks .it’s certainly the coolest job however you may no longer forgive yourself if you do not view this.!he09y:> http://GoogleStuffNewBusinessOpportunities/getpaid/97$/perhour ♥♥♥n♥♥n♥♥♥l♥♥♥m♥♥a♥r♥d♥v♥♥♥s♥♥j♥i♥♥♥i♥a♥♥♥s♥♥j♥♥♥k♥p♥♥♥u♥i♥f♥u♥♥♥o♥♥♥f♥u♥♥♥e::!pw591p:myelkw

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