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Dec 24 2019

Why Guys Should Steer Clear of Impossible Whoppers

As part of its campaign to become the Nike of junk food, Burger King has introduced a woke hamburger made out of politically correct imitation meat called the “Impossible Whopper.” Those of the politically incorrect male gender are warned to avoid it. Not only does the Impossible Whopper provide less than half of the usable protein as a regular Whopper (10 g vs 22 g), regular consumption could turn you into a soy boy.

Presenting Dr James Stangle, DVM:

The impossible whopper has 44 mg of estrogen and the whopper has 2.5 ng of estrogen. … That means an impossible whopper has 18 million times as much estrogen as a regular whopper. Just six glasses of soy milk per day has enough estrogen to grow boobs on a male. That’s the equivalent of eating four impossible whoppers per day.

It is unclear how many Impossible Whoppers you would have to consume to develop liberal views.

On a tip from Stormfax.

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