You’ve heard of the Maduro diet, which helped the population of Venezuela lose weight (except for the social rulers, of course). America has something better. All we have to do is vote blue no matter who and excess pounds are no longer a problem. Nor will we stress out over too many options at the grocery store. As an added bonus, walking when we used to be able to drive will keep us in shape:

On a tip from Wiggins.

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