If we fail to defend the sanctity of the foundations of civilization, surreal extremes of depravity become inevitable. Presenting the modern state of the family:

A throuple have made legal history after a court allowed three dads to be named on their children’s birth certificates.

Ian Jenkins, Alan Mayfield and Jeremy Allen Hodges used donated embryos and surrogates to welcome their two children, daughter Piper and son Parker, into the world.

The grotesque ruling represents “a huge milestone for polyamorous families to gain recognition in the US.”

Jenkins reports that the threesome have had “zero pushback from anyone in our professional and personal lives.”

Zero pushback is how the situation got this far. But who wants to express even mild reservations and risk getting canceled as a “hater”?

On a tip from Steve T.