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Sep 29 2022

Freak Defiles James Madison’s Flute

The scene at the end of Planet of the Apes, when Charlton Heston comes upon the neglected ruins of the Statue of Liberty lying broken on the beach, was gut-wrenching. But these days, nothing from fiction can compete with the horror unfolding in real life:

Melissa Viviane Jefferson a.k.a. “Lizzo” is a pop singer known for flaunting her morbid obesity by dressing in pornographic lingerie. Despite being extravagantly wealthy, she screeches that she is oppressed, on the grounds that America is racist. A fellow oppressed Woman of Color — Librarian of Congress Carla Diane Hayden — invited Lizzo to publicly defile a crystal flute owned by James Madison, one of the greatest men who has ever lived.

Even if it were an attempt at homage, it would be in grotesquely bad taste, considering Lizzo’s obscene outfit, her Miley Cyrus-style protruding tongue, and of course the profane twerking. It was the diametric opposite of homage:

James Madison, primary mastermind of the US Constitution, is now fashionably regarded as problematic because he lived in the 18th century by 18th century mores, because of the three-fifths compromise that allowed the Constitution to take effect, but mostly because he was a white guy and a giant.

For an encore, Lizzo might squirt diarrhea on the Declaration of Independence. One of her ancestors took its author’s name. But the family line has apparently decayed since then.

On tips from Mr. Freemarket, Chris Neilson, and Franco.


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