Category Archives: Newspeak Dictionary

Newspeak Dictionary Update: Parasite Not Baby

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While pranking passersby to see how they would react to abortion clinics at Walmart, Mark Dice came across a timely update to the Newspeak Dictionary. We are no longer to refer to babies as “babies” unless the mother decides not to kill them. Otherwise, we are to refer to babies as “parasites.”

Pure evil doesn’t really look like the latex demons in horror movies. It is more likely to look like the girl in the crop top in the video below:

If they have that much contempt for the worth of an innocent baby’s life, imagine how little they must value the lives of sexists, racists, homophobes, et cetera.

On a tip from KirklesWorth.

Word “Marijuana” Proclaimed to Be Racist

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Google Docs may need adjustment to flag the word “marijuana,” because the moonbats running Washington State have deleted it from the Newspeak Dictionary on the grounds that it is racist:

Legislators recently passed a law that changes every Revised Code of Washington with the word “marijuana.” The change gets rid of the term, swapping it out for the word “cannabis.”

Supporters say the word “marijuana” has a long history of racism.

Good thing they have other words to use instead. Democrats encourage the use of marijuana because of course they do, so long as we refer to it with approved language.

Barks Democratic State Rep Melanie Morgan:

“Even though it seems simple because it’s just one word, the reality is we’re healing the wrongs that were committed against Black and Brown people around cannabis.”

No doubt her eyes misted over as she was swept away by this great historic moment.

The word “marijuana” is mainly racist becomes it comes from Spanish, implying in the minds of Evergreen State bureauweenies that Mexican immigrants were accused of smoking it back when it was bad.

This means the word is also transphobic, as Spanish is a gendered language that insists on the male/female dichotomy. If you must use the word “marijuana,” please say “marijuanx” instead, just as you would say “Latinx,” so as not to offend our transsexual cultural overlords.

On a tip from seaoh.

Google Docs to Automatically Alert Users to Thoughtcrime

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Excisions from the Newspeak Dictionary come so fast and furious that even the most devoutly obedient liberal runs the risk of cancelation by his own mob for using a previously innocuous but now forbidden word. To address this problem, Google will automatically present warnings when people stray from political correctness by using disfavored terms like “policeman” and “landlord”:

The warnings will alert users that what they have typed “may not be inclusive to all readers,” while suggesting users should “Consider using different words,” offering woke corrections like ‘police officer’ or ‘property owner’.

Other words regarded as offensive include “motherboard” and “mankind.”

This Google Docs feature is on by default for “enterprise-level users.” No doubt applications will be found for this technology on the Google search engine.

Eventually, Google will devise an intracranial chip that automatically blocks and replaces incorrect thoughts. That is the ultimate objective of the liberal war on our vocabulary.

On a tip from Franco.

Feds Get Serious About Erasing Word “Squaw”

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The ideology of our woke overlords rests on the belief that whites are mean to racial groups that liberals prefer. To prop up this crumbling lie, leftists resort to hate hoaxes and to declaring neutral terms to be derogatory.

In an irritating demonstration of authoritarian arrogance and phony virtue signaling, Democrats piously demanded that Squaw Peak — among the most prominent features of Phoenix — be referred to as “Piestewa Peak.” People still call Squaw Peak “Squaw Peak,” but never on TV.

The large number of landmarks throughout the country with the formerly anodyne term “squaw” in the name now constitutes evidence that America is racist, as per liberal doctrine.

No worries, oppressed Indians. Democrats will ride to your rescue by erasing our heritage:

The United States Department of the Interior (DOI) proposed a list of new names for more than 660 geographic features across the country last month, the agency announced in a statement.

Led by the U.S. Secretary of the Interior Deb Haaland, the first Native American to serve as cabinet secretary, the February 2022 release of the list marks the next step in a sweeping plan to remove the racist and misogynist slur “squaw” from the national geographic landscape. Hundreds of U.S. geographic sites, including mountains, rivers, lakes, remote islands and more, currently are named using the word, report Neil Vigdor and Christine Hauser for the New York Times.

How much money they will print to pay for this gesture was not disclosed.

The word “squaw” is now so thoroughly canceled that bureaucrats will not put it in writing lest they be accused of a thought crime. Instead, they right “sq___” or refer to it as the “S word.”

Which word will be designated as “racist and misogynist” next is anyone’s guess. Finding a suitable candidate is the sort of thing overpaid federal bureaucrats do with their time, as inflation spirals out of control, inner cities degenerate into violent anarchy, a vast conquering army of illegal aliens pours across the border, and America circles the drain.

On a tip from Jack Bauer.

UN Removes “War” and “Invasion” From Newspeak Dictionary

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Did the 24/7 media coverage convince you that there is a war in Ukraine? Did you think Russia had invaded? Then you are using an outmoded version of the Newspeak Dictionary and should update at once, in light of new revisions from the United Nations:

The United Nations’ Department of Global Communications instructed staff of the international organisation not to refer to the situation in Ukraine as a “war” or “invasion”, in a move to balance political sensitivities as powerful member state Russia cracks down domestically on those who use the words.

Instead, UN staff were instructed to use the terms “conflict” or “military offensive” to describe Russia’s invasion of its neighbour, which has killed hundreds of civilians and forced two million people to flee the country.

In an email to a staff mailing list on Monday with the subject line “Ukraine crisis communications guidelines”, the director of the United Nations Regional Information Centre instructed employees not to describe the situation as a war and not to add the Ukrainian flag to personal or official social media accounts or websites.

Globalist bureauweenies have to be mindful of certain sensitivities. The only countries they don’t need to worry about offending are the USA and Israel.

The UN might have issued a resolution condemning the “military offensive” against Ukraine. But that is off the table, because Russia can block it as a permanent member of the Security Council.

That’s how useful the United Nations is. That’s what American taxpayers gets for our $11 billion per year.

On a tip from Mr. Freemarket.

Anti-Defamation League Redefines Racism

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Under liberal rule, we are told we are racists, and that this is the worst thing imaginable, by people whose worldview is quintessentially racist. Even some progressives may have enough self-awareness to feel squeamish about denouncing dissidents as racist while imposing an ideology centered on worship of blacks and hatred of whites. No matter; as their endless subtractions from the Newspeak Dictionary prove, leftists control the language.

The social justice warriors of the Anti-Defamation League are changing the definition of “racism” so as to exculpate racists like themselves. Their new definition of racism:

Racism: The marginalization and/or oppression of people of color based on a socially constructed racial hierarchy that privileges white people.

Racism isn’t racism; racism is what evil white people do.

Not even low-IQ race hustler Ibram X. Kendi could come up with a more preposterous definition. His definition of racism takes the circular route: “a collection of racist policies that lead to racial inequity that are substantiated by racist ideas.”

Expect Merriam-Webster to adopt the ADL definition soon.

A passage from Lewis Carroll comes to mind:

“When I use a word,” Humpty Dumpty said in rather a scornful tone, “it means just what I choose it to mean — neither more nor less.”

“The question is,” said Alice, “whether you can make words mean so many different things.”

“The question is,” said Humpty Dumpty, “which is to be master — that’s all.”

That was before the word “master” was excised from the Newspeak Dictionary.

On tips from Mr. Freemarket and Gringoman.

University of Washington Newspeak Dictionary Updates

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To avoid cancelation, it is essential to keep up to the moment with academia’s deluge of updates to the Newspeak Dictionary. In its IT Inclusive Language Guide, the University of Washington Information Technology Department excludes still more of our language on grounds of political incorrectness. The guide helpfully provides explanations as to why banned terms are “problematic.”

“Blackout date,” “black list,” “blackbox,” and “black hat hacker” are forbidden because according to establishment ideology, you must never associate black with anything bad. By the same token, “white list,” “white hat hacker,” etc. are off limits because you must never associate white with anything good. The terms “master/slave” and “webmaster” are nixed because of slavery, which according to our rulers’ religion has only ever affected blacks.

Other terms are found objectionable for less obvious reasons. Here’s why the term “grandfathered” makes the list:

“Grandfather clause” originated in the American South in the 1890s as a way to defy the 15th Amendment and prevent black Americans from voting.

You can’t say “brown bags” either, because,

Brown bags trace back to the “brown paper bag test,” which was traditionally used to judge skin color by certain African-American sororities and fraternities.

You can’t say “cakewalk,” because,

The cakewalk was a pre-Civil War dance performed by enslaved people, and the winner of which would be given a cake.

You can’t say “peanut gallery,” because,

Peanut gallery originally referred to the balconies of segregated theaters, where African Americans had to sit.

In our culture, everything has something to do with advantaged blacks actually being somehow oppressed, just as in the USSR under Lenin everything had something to do with overthrowing the already extirpated bourgeoisie.

You can’t say “lower the bar,” because,

This phrase is based on the erroneous idea that a company has to relax hiring standards in order to add people from different racial, ethnic, gender backgrounds.

Kamala Harris and our next Supreme Court Justice are cases in point.

The list goes on at some length, reminding us what educrats do for their bloated, heavily taxpayer-subsidized salaries. Tough luck if you went into IT instead of liberal arts in hopes of avoiding political indoctrination.

Eventually, they will pare down the Newspeak Dictionary until every phrase in the English language has been erased except for “Black Lives Matter!” At that point, we will be free of thoughtcrime, because we will not have the vocabulary to think incorrect thoughts.

On a tip from Mr. Freemarket.

Gavin Newsom Strikes “Gangs” From Newspeak Dictionary

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The word “gang” has been struck from the Newspeak Dictionary. Henceforth, we are to replace it with “groups of folks.” To speak otherwise would be to risk offending gangbangers, who qualify for protected status because if they ever voted, it would be for Democrats.

With each passing day, the list of permissible vocabulary gets shorter. Soon we will not have words to express thoughtcrime.

On a tip from Varla.