One reason liberal elite types are the only ones who find trendy solutions to nonexistent climate problems appealing is that they are the only ones who would. Another is that they are the only ones who can afford them. Electric cars are one example. Vegan sandwiches are another.

From Britain:

Tesco’s vegan sandwich range has shrunk by 28 per cent since 2019, while Morrisons and Asda have entirely removed their plant-based sandwich options.

People won’t buy them, in part because they cost too much. A “sustainable food alliance” called Eating Better confirms that vegan sandwiches are the most expensive kind.

Nonetheless, vegan sandwiches will help save the planet, because if we stop eating food that tastes good, fewer cows and pigs will be raised and their flatulence will not make it be too warm out, according to moonbat doctrine.

Simon Billing, the executive director of Eating Better, said: “Three years on from our last sandwich survey, and with yet more evidence from climate scientists on the need to reduce our meat consumption, it’s deeply disappointing that the sandwich aisle is still too meaty and that plant-based is too pricey.”

Clearly, vegan sandwiches must be mandatory if we expect the climate to stop fluctuating. At the very least, they must be subsidized by taxpayers.

On a tip from Steve T.

At first, I thought this was parody — along the lines of the Babylon Bee, but more over the top. But no, British soldiers really are demanding vegan uniforms.

From Rebel News:

As detailed by the Telegraph, the newly-formed group in the British Army called The Ministry of Defence Vegan and Vegetarian Network has launched a campaign to institute a new set of policies to empower vegans and vegetarians who enlisted in the armed forces. …

One of the policies proposed by the vegan group is for personnel to wear vegetarian footwear not made from real leather. The move comes after a helicopter technician objected to wearing leather boots in 2019, prompting the Royal Air Force to consider amending its policy.

The British military has already pandered to vegans through its Army EATs campaign, which provides more vegetarian food for soldiers.

Vegan leather is less durable, less economical, and worse for the environment. No matter; this is a religious issue. Vegan moonbats believe that any animal product is unclean.

In an earlier time, similar religious fanatics brought down the British East India Company, which effectively controlled India. It had its own army, which relied on native troops. These tended to be either Hindu or Muslim. Hindus believed the lubrication used on the ammunition they were issued to be made from sacred cows; Muslims believed it to be made from unclean swine.

Via Guns.com:

The imprisonment of Hindu and Muslim soldiers over their refusal to use the offending rounds led to rebellions in almost every Hindu and Muslim regiment in the Company’s Army. Known as the War of Independence in India and as the Sepoy Mutiny in the West, the engagement ran for almost three years and cost the lives of hundreds of soldiers and civilians on both sides.

Though the rebellion was put down, the engagement ended the East India Company’s tenure as a military force. The company itself was nationalized and the British government assumed its operations in India the next year. This spelled the end of the megacorporation and in 1874, it was dissolved.

It would hardly be surprising if the moonbat religion manages to bring down the modern British army.

On tips from Franco.

All things moonbats don’t like are racist. Moonbats don’t like for us to eat meat; they want us to eat larvae, weeds, plastic trash, and synthetic pseudofood instead. Therefore, allowing people to eat meat is racist. All things moonbats don’t like are also misogynistic. Therefore, meat is misogynistic too. All things moonbats don’t like are the fault of white people, so it stands to reason that whiteness causes meat-eating.

Presenting proof in the form of the Oxford Union Vegan Argument — it’s a little long, but Carol Adams keeps the laughs coming:

Remember now, no calling liberal men “soy boys.” That would be “neo-Nazi messaging.”

She didn’t dwell on eating meat making it be too warm outside, because everyone already knows that.

On a tip from ABC of the ANC. Hat tip: Investment Watch.

If vegetarianism isn’t unnatural, why do people have canine teeth for tearing meat? Moonbats counter that canines can be vegetarians too. There is even video proof. Except the video didn’t turn out so well:

Presumably the video was intended to ridicule moonbats, or it never would have been shown to the public. But some vegetarians really do believe that all animals can be converted to their unhealthy religion. A wokester once informed me in total seriousness that pet snakes should be fed cherry tomatoes so as not to oppress rodents.

Anyone who imposes vegetarianism on a dog or cat should be charged with animal abuse. Imposing it on a growing child is still worse.

Hat tip: Not the Bee.

New York City restaurant Eleven Madison Park has cooked up the essence of life under the rule of the sanctimonious liberal elite. It has gone vegan — unless you are a member of the mega-rich. Then you can eat meat in a back room:

This May chef Daniel Humm had announced with much flowery fanfare that his Eleven Madison Park restaurant would reopen in June from its pandemic closure with a fully plant-based vegan menu. But not just any meager meatless menu: It’s 12 courses for $335.

Humm hammered his message home by telling the New York Times the restaurant would no longer serve meat or seafood, huffing, “The current food system is simply not sustainable, in so many ways.”

Keeping a pricey restaurant afloat on sheer moonbattery without offering a normal human diet may also be unsustainable. So Eleven Madison Park offers a private dining room for big-money corporate events.

The private dining room at Eleven Madison Park comes complete with a meat-heavy menu that includes foie gras, beef tenderloin, roasted chicken and pork.

Like the backroom carnivores, Humm is no member of the hoi polloi. He is dating zillionaire ultramoonbat Laurene Powell Jobs. They will still gorge themselves on foie gras after the globalist ruling class mandates that the rest of us have to eat larvae and weeds for the sake of the climate.

As with all things liberal elitist, regardless of whether you can afford Eleven Madison Park, you have to help pay for it. Its connections earned it a $5 million payoff from Biden in Covid relief.

On tips from Mr. Freemarket and R F. Hat tip: American Thinker.

Moonbats sneeringly crow that rumors of Biden’s handlers radically restricting our meat consumption are false. Yet it is obvious that eating meat is among the many freedoms they will take away from us as soon as they have the leverage.

Epicurious self-righteously proclaims that it will no longer publish new beef recipes, because beef has been canceled. Government policy is downstream of culture. It’s only a matter of time until leftists ban meat.

No worries; we can just eat synthetic meat instead.

Since money is believed to be free if Big Government spends it, vegan Ezra Klein of the New York Times wants to “launch a moonshot for meatless meat”:

All we need to do is replace the animals, or at least a lot of them. Technologically, we’re closer to that than you might think. What we need is for government to put money and muscle behind the project — just as it’s doing for electric cars and weatherized homes and renewable energy — so that the future happens fast enough to save the present.

Because Biden’s handlers aren’t wasting enough of our money.

Klein bizarrely blames the virus that the ChiComs apparently cooked up at the Wuhan Institute of Virology on meat consumption, giving Big Government another reason to restrict it. Also, meat is mean to animals that only exist because we raise them for food. Worst of all, eating meat causes catastrophic global warming according to liberal dogma.

At its heart, the American Jobs Plan is a climate bill. But there isn’t a dollar for alternative proteins… That’s worse than a mistake. It’s a failure of policy design. Luckily, it’s easily fixed.

Namely, by throwing massive amounts of other people’s money at meat substitutes that only moonbats would be willing to eat. Klein calls $2 billion “laughably small.”

We already have an alternative protein solution. I wonder how many $billions moonbat bureaucrats will throw at me if I tell them about peanut butter.

On tips from Henry and Dragon’s Lair.