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Category: Global Warming

Mar 28 2023

Hairdressers to Indoctrinate Clients on Global Warming

Neutral territory does not exist under totalitarianism. There can be no escape anywhere from the ideology of the ruling class. For example, in Australia, hairdressers have been enlisted to indoctrinate a captive audience while cutting their hair:

More than 400 hairdressers have attended workshops as part of a project called A Brush With Climate being driven by Paloma’s owner, Paloma Rose Garcia.

Paloma’s is a hair salon in Sydney.

During the sessions, hairdressers hear the basics of climate science and get to role play how conversations might go. They also take one of the posters back to their own salons.

The posters read, “This salon chats about love, life & climate action.”

Garcia tells a story about one regular client, a mother of two. After having the climate chat and talking about solar power and ethical banking, she left happy.

Solar power means paying more for unreliable electricity generated using hardware made by our communist Chinese adversaries. Ethical banking means entrusting your money to woke banks that invest in green energy boondoggles. The only lesson learned from Silicon Valley Bank and Signature Bank is that Big Government is there to hand out other people’s money when banks run by leftists fail.

Schemes Paloma Rose Garcia,

“You’re letting someone touch your hair and so you have to like them. That trust allows them to start that conversation.”

That is, you can exploit trust to manipulate clients for political ends.

The pitch has to be hard and relentless to convince people to give up their freedom and their standard of living in the name of an ideology that is farcical on its face. Hairdressers are not known for their scientific acumen, but it is doubtful many truly believe there is anything wrong with the weather that bureaucrats can fix through taxation and hyperregulation.

On a tip from Steve T.

Mar 26 2023

Biden Regime Comes After Air Conditioners

Democrats were not likely to stop at gas stoves, which they still want to ban. Nor would they stop with refrigerators and washing machines. My fellow Phoenix residents will be alarmed to learn than now Biden’s handlers are coming after our air conditioners:

The Biden administration announced its latest home appliance regulations this week, targeting air conditioners in an action it said would reduce the nation’s carbon emissions.

As the reference to the essential plant nutrient carbon dioxide suggests, Democrats are imposing the excessive regulations in the name of “tackling the climate crisis.”

The climate crisis exists only in the imaginations of gullible moonbats. In contrast, the government hypertrophy crisis is quite real. If not addressed, it will leave us without appliances. Progressives will inflict this progressively, by using Deep State regulation to drive up the cost of appliances so that ever fewer can afford them.

On a tip from Wiggins.

Mar 23 2023

City Bans New Gas Stations to Prevent Climate Fluctuation

Looks like the planet is not doomed after all. The city of Louisville, Colorado is taking measures to prevent the climate from continuing to fluctuate the way it always has:

On Tuesday evening, the City Council of Louisville, about 20 miles northwest of Denver, voted unanimously to pass Ordinance 1851, which would basically cap the number of city gas stations at six.

Councilmember Maxine Most explains the objective:

“We have an obligation to take every step possible to address the changes to our climate that are ravaging our planet and directly impacting the health, well-being and livelihoods of the constituents we represent in Louisville.”

No doubt the supposedly rising oceans are of particular concern in Louisville, which is a mere 5,335 feet above sea level.

This repression would prove inconvenient were Louisville to grow. But that is unlikely to happen under moonbat rule. Most is a member of Louisville’s Economic Vitality Committee.

Development will have to take place elsewhere, as Louisville withers and dies on behalf of the climate.

On tips from Franco and Mr. Freemarket.

Mar 22 2023

Greta Thunberg Awarded Doctorate in Theology

Don’t take my word for it that global warming has advanced from a political ideology to a religion. The University of Helsinki has confirmed it by conferring an honorary degree on the perpetual child prophet of climate chaos Greta Thunberg — not in meteorology, about which she seems to know nothing, or even in political science, but in theology:

Liberals used to screech about the sacred separation of church and state, but not so much now that the Biden Regime is bankrupting the country by looting it on behalf of Greta’s religion.

Because it is a religion, the global warming hoax is based on faith rather than reason. This is why factual information of the sort Tony Heller provides bounces uselessly off moonbats:

On tips from Mr. Freemarket and Occam’s Stubble.

Mar 19 2023

Stove Restrictions Expand to Other Appliances

When the plan to ban gas stoves encountered resistance, the Biden Regime pretended to back down, but the ban is back on. Like the planned ban on freelance work, it will be imposed surreptitiously through the Deep State, which does not have to face the wrath of voters. They won’t stop with stoves. Refrigerators, washing machines, and dryers are also deemed offensive to the primitive weather gods worshiped by Democrats.

There would be too much pushback if household appliances were banned outright. Progressivism entails boiling the frog slowly so that it doesn’t jump out of the pot. For now, these devices will just be made more expensive — because according to our rulers’ religion, that will stop the climate from fluctuating.

The administration claimed its new refrigerator and washer-dryer standards would cut carbon dioxide emissions by 233 million metric tons over 30 years. That amounts to 0.02%, two hundredths, of world emissions. In exchange for that virtually nonexistent environmental benefit, consumers will pay upfront costs of $7.58 billion to buy more expensive washers and $6.9 billion for more expensive refrigerators.

If it is worth having, liberals will first make it more expensive, then take it away.

On a tip from Blackjack.

Mar 12 2023

Climate Mental Health

Whereas most will agree that the climate fluctuates, belief in the global warming hoax is a psychiatric condition. Kamala “Heartbeat Away” Harris confirms it while jabbering about “climate mental health”:

We can’t count on the kooks at CNBC for investment advice, but moonbattery is their area of expertise, so let’s hear what they say:

It’s called climate anxiety, and it’s a real mental health condition that can take time to address, according to Portland, Oregon-based environmental psychologist Thomas Doherty. At the Aspen Ideas Festival in Aspen, Colorado … Doherty spoke about the “learning curve” it takes to combat the anxiety, or even despair, stemming from climate change.

The guy is getting paid to be an “environmental psychologist.” I was going to say, “Only in Portland and Aspen,” but that would be wishful thinking.

Both the United Nations and the American Psychological Association (APA) have found that humans are increasingly at risk of climate change-induced mental health issues.

The UN and APA are likewise expert in the field of moonbattery.

In 2021, a global study found that 45% of people between the ages of 16 and 25 said climate anxiety was affecting their daily lives.

The percentage of people whose daily lives are affected by climate change itself is more like zero. But those who enjoy wallowing in neurosis can still seize on it to make themselves miserable.

Too bad they make others miserable too. Small children do not know better than to take enviromoonbattery seriously. Inflicting distress by submersing them in politically motivated gloom is not healthy, as we saw when Rep Katie Porter (D-CA) used global warming doctrine to instill in her daughter an affective disorder.

Nonetheless, schools are required by law to indoctrinate children with this toxic ideology in Connecticut and soon Oregon.

On tips from Mr. Freemarket, Ed McAninch, and Jack D.

Mar 10 2023

Bill Gates Pooh-Poohs Individual Sacrifice for Climate

Zillionaire climate warrior Bill Gates, who wants us to eat synthetic pseudofood and to poison the atmosphere with sulfur dioxide because global warming, addresses the massive carbon footprint that accompanies his Louis XVI lifestyle:

“In climate movements, you can get this ‘Hey, we’ve been consuming too much,’ and ‘Hey, maybe we shouldn’t travel anymore,’” Gates said last week in remarks delivered in India [where he no doubt flew by private jet]. “I don’t think we can count on people living an impoverished lifestyle as a solution to climate.”

By Bill Gates standards, “impoverished lifestyle” means spending less in a minute than the average Indian does in a lifetime.

Gates, who is estimated to be the fourth-richest person on Earth, went on to say it was not realistic to expect that the climate crisis could be addressed by personal choices such as giving up eating meat.

Evidently Gates has no intention of restricting his own diet, despite his devotion to the meat-hating climate gods. Given his paunchy physique, it would be more constructive for him to focus on carbohydrates anyway.

The notion that climate change is too big a problem to be solved by individual lifestyle decisions is commonly held by many, like Gates, who are working to address what they see as a crisis. Even John Kerry, President Biden’s climate envoy, has signaled that new technology will need to be developed for the world to achieve emissions goals.

Conveniently, this attitude frees up Kerry to continue his massively carbon-spewing lifestyle while droning uninterestingly about the evils of carbon emissions.

Not being an individual who can be called out for personal hypocrisy but rather comprising a faceless Borg, the UN is free to demand each person’s lifestyle comply with global warming ideology:

“Everyone can help limit climate change. From the way we travel, to the electricity we use, the food we eat, and the things we buy, we can make a difference,” the U.N. states on a website that highlights 10 actions individuals can take to address the climate crisis.

Other Democrats concur, driving up inflation with wasteful spending ostensibly intended to bribe us into behaving with greater climate piousness:

The Inflation Reduction Act also looks to change individual behavior on a scale that will add up to meaningful cuts to emissions by offering tax credits designed to wean the public off oil, gas and coal. The law, which was passed in September, includes $7.5 billion in electric vehicle tax credits meant to get people to stop driving gas-powered cars, and $24 billion in credits to help people switch from gas-powered heaters to electric heat pumps and from gas stoves to induction ranges.

Believing that you can change the weather by driving an electric car or forsaking a gas stove is so absurd that it requires not mere idiocy but the absolute devotion to ideological obedience that distinguishes a true moonbat from the less righteous rabble.

Looks like the problem is donuts, not meat.

On a tip from Lyle.

Mar 05 2023

Snowless California

In an attempt to gin up global warming hysteria, liberals have been shrieking for years that soon there will be no snow in California because carbon emissions. Meanwhile, snowpack in California has been setting all-time record highs.

Ellen DeGenerate has tried to spin all the precipitation in California as proof that primitive weather gods are angry with us for not kneeling at the altar of the global warming hoax. Leftist propaganda outlets like CNN and the US Government don’t even try to spin it; they just pretend it isn’t happening. There is still a drought in California, buried along with people’s houses beneath the white drifts.

Tony Heller dumps a shovel load of snow atop the dead credibility of the liberal establishment:

As soon as the snow melts California will be back in a drought emergency, thanks to moonbat rule, which in the name of minnows prevents the state from constructing sufficient reservoirs to store the water before it trickles wasted out into the ocean. We will be told that the endless drought is caused by our failure to drive electric cars.

On a tip from Lyle.

Mar 05 2023

Cricket-Flavored Ice Cream

Some of the simple pleasures of life will still be permitted even if liberals succeed in imposing utopia. For example, we will still have ice cream. So as to save the planet, it will be cricket flavored:

Eiscafé Rino in the southern city of Rottenburg [Germany] introduced cricket-flavored ice cream topped with the dried insects themselves [last] week.

Perfect name for a town suffering from moonbattery.

Owner Thomas Micolin created the delicacy, and proudly posed with it on Instagram.

The point is not to provide ice cream that tastes good, but to posture politically:

“It’s a small message for the food that could be the future,” Micolino said.

Woke social engineers want us to eat bugs because agriculture is haram in their religion. They demand we believe there is something wrong with the prevailing weather and that replacing food with insects will improve it.

No doubt moonbats will buy the disgusting ice cream so they can boast that they helped stave off global warming until such a time as the United Nations can save us all by blotting out the sun.

On a tip from Wiggins.

Mar 05 2023

United Nations Plots Global Doom

The zany ideology of our moonbat rulers stops being funny when they superimpose it on the real world. For example, in the name of their imaginary climate crisis, the kooks comprising the United Nations are planning measures that could disrupt the planet’s ability to sustain life:

The United Nations published an in-depth document outlining possible “Solar Radiation Modification” programs, otherwise describing a series of methods to cool the earth’s temperature in emergency situations.

According to devotees of the global warming hoax, we are already in an emergency situation and always will be so long as the climate fluctuates or there is weather.

UN bureauweenies admit there is “little information on the risks of SRM,” but they have experts to resolve the issue. Similar experts in the UN’s World Health Organization resolved how to deal with Covid.

The first suggested method involves stratospheric aerosol injections, or “SAI,” which involve “injecting highly reflective sub-micron-size particles into the stratosphere,” requiring aircrafts that can release the particles at an altitude of 20-25 kilometers.

Any country that tries to do this should be nuked immediately before it makes the planet unlivable for the rest of us.

The idea was theorized around 2017 and then subsequently experimented with by Bill Gates and Harvard University in 2018.

If it is sinister enough for Bill Gates and his fellow liberal elitists at Harvard, it’s surprising James Bond never had to stop SPECTRE from doing it.

Another method is known as “marine cloud brightening,” which “would be achieved by introducing sea salt aerosols to produce a larger number of smaller cloud droplets, thus ‘brightening’ clouds.”

Again the objective would be to reflect sunlight back into space, because according to liberal ideology, the sunlight that sustains all life on earth is bad.

A third method involves simulating the effects of a volcanic eruption that blocks out the sun’s rays.

Remember when we were warned of the “nuclear winter” that could threaten the existence of the human race following WWIII? Progressives want to bring this about on purpose by polluting the air with sulfur dioxide.

Sulfur dioxide is described as “a toxic gas responsible for the odor of burnt matches. It is released naturally by volcanic activity and is produced as a by-product of copper extraction and the burning of sulfur-bearing fossil fuels.”

The smell of this poisonous gas has been associated with hell and Satan for good reason. As we should have learned from the 100 million killed by their own communist governments, letting leftists take control means creating hell on earth.

Other suggestions include “whitening the roofs of urban buildings” with paint to make them more reflective, genetically modifying the color of crops to make them reflect sunlight, and of course “space mirrors.”

The latter options for rejecting the sun’s life-giving rays are where they will probably start: gigantic futile gestures that will cost $trillions and accomplish nothing whatsoever. But when these fail to eradicate weather, the UN will have to fall back on the more extreme measures — unless we wise up by then and call in an air strike on UN headquarters.

On tips from Feet2Fire and Mr. Freemarket.

Mar 02 2023

Vatican Says to Give Up Fossil Fuels for Lent

Progressives aspire to abolish Christianity altogether. In the meantime, they subvert and exploit it. Not even Merrick Garland could inflict as much damage as the moonbats who have infiltrated the Vatican, the official newspaper of which calls for the faithful to acknowledge Lent by giving up not unnecessary luxuries but the fossil fuels that keep us alive:

In the February 20 edition, L’Osservatore Romano noted how Catholics are being called to use Lent as “a time for reflections and concrete actions such as ‘fasting from gas.’” Additional measures to take included “limiting the use of heaters,” which the newspaper stated would act “not only as a sign of solidarity with Ukrainians and other afflicted peoples, but also to defund the war economy.”

With moonbats, the issue is never the issue; the issue is always ramming their psychotic ideology down your throat. Lent isn’t about Christ’s 40-day fast in the desert; it is about the war on energy and siding with the degenerate regime in Ukraine against Putin, who for all his faults wants to be a champion of Western Civilization and its traditions. These are under attack from within, notably including Christianity.

Giving up fossil fuels for Lent or ever is not only senseless but impossible. We rely on them for every aspect of our lives. Without fossil fuels, there would be virtually no electricity, transportation, employment, or food.

You might as well call on people to fast from oxygen. But the objective with leftists is to make politically correct gestures, not constructive suggestions.

On a tip from Lyle.

Feb 22 2023

Venice Canals Dry Up as Seas Fail to Rise

Because we have refused to sufficiently forsake our wealth and freedom in the name of leftist climate ideology, the seas are rising to wash us away as foretold by the prophet Al Gore. Oh wait:

Some of Venice’s smaller canals have practically dried up due a prolonged spell of low tides, frustrating boat crews and bewildering tourists.

The lunar cycle combined with high atmospheric pressure has created a problem not only for tourists.

Since the canals essentially serve as streets in car-less Venice, the phenomenon of the last days has added to the challenges of every-day life in the lagoon city. Ambulance boats in some cases have had to tie up farther from their destination, forcing medical crews to sometimes hand carry stretchers over long distances since their vessels can’t progress up canals reduced to a trickle of water and muck.

Maybe Venetians should try eating more meat. According ruling class doctrine, that should melt the icecaps and bring the water levels up.

On a tip from Chuck A.

Feb 13 2023

Saving the Climate by Polluting the Seas With Antacid

Imaginary crises call for whimsical solutions — like curing the nonexistent climate problem by polluting the ocean with Rolaids:

The ocean plays a critical role in curbing climate change. Like forests and wetlands, it naturally recycles carbon dioxide from the atmosphere at a massive scale.

[Canadian oceanographer Will] Burt works for Planetary Technologies, a Canadian startup that’s attempting to harness and accelerate that potential by adding antacid powder to the ocean.

The theory goes that by altering seawater chemistry, the ocean’s surface could absorb far more atmospheric carbon than it does naturally.

This would deny the precious nutrient CO2 to the crops that thrive on it. The effect on marine life cannot be known in advance. But the important thing is for moonbats to be cutting edge in their lunacy while posturing righteously as defenders of the climate.

Planetary intends to recycle mine waste from a defunct asbestos mine in Quebec to produce pure magnesium hydroxide, which the company believes would help accelerate the ocean’s carbon uptake ability in the areas where it’s used.

Raising funds is no problem:

The e-commerce giant Shopify has already committed to purchasing 730 tons in future carbon credits from the company — a move designed to accelerate its efforts to perfect the method.

If corporate moonbats wanting to purchase green virtue for public relations purposes don’t cough up enough cash, Big Government can always step in by printing some more.

Another bright idea entails “shooting lasers to electrochemically change the water’s chemistry.” Hopefully Austin Powers will arrive in time to stop Dr. Evil from putting any of this into practice.

The Top 10 Craziest Solutions to Global Warming list needs extending. At least choking the seas with magnesium hydroxide couldn’t be any more catastrophic than filling the air with sulfur to block out the sun, as Bill Gates wants to do.

On a tip from Wiggins.

Feb 12 2023

Imaginary Climate History

In George Orwell’s 1984, protagonist Winston Smith’s job at the Ministry of Truth is to erase documentation of the past so that it can be reinvented to serve the current political interests of the ruling party. As Orwell wrote, “The past was erased, the erasure was forgotten, the lie became the truth.”

Tony Heller demonstrates how this is principle is applied to the weather record, now that even that has been politicized:

In the future, everything Heller documents will disappear down the memory hole. We will remember a past that never happened.

On a tip from Lyle.

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